Sometimes it's really hard to find "peace". But, I think if you look for it, you find a little bit here, and a little bit there. Little pieces of calm. Little reminders that everything's cool. It's gone be aiight.
After all, who ever said life was always peaches & cream?
I just wanted to share a couple of little pieces of sunshine here on the bloggy today.
The first is the photo above, taken around 7:30 am at my Meemaw's house.
It makes me happy.
The second is the feeling of peace and calm that comes from just being still and listening. Simplicity. God does talk, if we can calm down long enough to listen.
The photos below are taken at an older church in my hometown.
To me, there is something serene and comforting about old churches.
Just the people, the hymn books, the Bible and God.
I realize I have spoken more of God lately, likely because of the baby we lost. I also realized I have lost a few followers.
Well, good riddance, sugar pies.
I believe that God comes and finds us in His time, whether we are ready or not. I also believe that He comes around in simple ways to remind us that He's there.
I have to tell y'all what happened to me last week. An unknown number called my cell, and I didn't recognize it, so I ignored it. Figured they'd leave a message if they really knew me and needed to talk to me.
Several hours later, the same number called back.
Anj and I were online, trying to look up the number, and all we found was that it was a local wireless number.
A few moments later, I realized they'd left a voice mail this time.
Guess who it was.
My surgeon.
Calling to thank me {?!?!?!} for the thank you note I sent to his office.
You see, about a week after my surgery, I decided to send the nurses on that hospital floor, and my gynecologists' office a thank you card. Because even though it is "their job" to care for patients physically, they went above and beyond to make sure I was comfortable & felt taken care of, and treated me like a human being with feelings instead of just another "ectopic".
I have had doctors in the past who were assholes and should not have been in charge of taking care of a house plant, much less people trying to have a child.
Anyway, in the card, I thanked him and my other doctor {who couldn't do my surgery because he had to fly out of town that night for a conference}, as well as the nurse and the sonogram lady because they were all so warm, and so kind. I never once feared the surgery, and I just felt in my heart that I was in good hands. I told them in the card that I thanked God for putting me under their care, because the whole experience would have been absolutely terrifying had this all happened with my last doctor {whose name sounded very close to Dr. Vulgar Puss - should have been a sign}.
So, he said in the voice mail that he couldn't let it go without calling me to tell me how much the card meant to them, and that it was so heartfelt and sweet, and that he prays that I will have a healthy pregnancy in the very near future, and God bless.
I think God talks to us all in His own special way. We all hear Him differently. But to me, that may as well have been God himself callin to say, "Girrrrl, I got this. You need to just calm down, shug."
Soooo, a couple things:
1) Never underestimate the power of thank you - you never know how it might brighten someone's day, or even mean much, much more to them than you even intended
2) God is bigger than all our problems. He will talk with you if you ask Him to. Try not to give up even though it's hard to understand how God can allow so much pain even though He loves us.
3) Trust your instincts. I never liked my last doctor. He was a dick. He was monotone and sounded just like that dude on the Clear Eyes commercial. I knew when I met these doctors the first time, that I was in good hands, and I am tellin y'all, it made all the difference in how I am coping with what happened.
I would also like to say thank you to those of you who read my blog. I love nothing more than reading your comments, and hearing what you think. My blog is a little different than most blogs in blogland. A lot of my readers are people who are not in my age group, and are people who grew up the way I did, and like me, feel blessed to have grown up in the rural south. I don't really know "what this blog is about". I just write whatever I want. I try not to talk politics, because it's a good way to lose friends.
But, I do talk God, and there won't ever come a time when I refrain from talking about God when I want to. That's what's wrong with the world now. People believe in something in private, but when it comes to standing up for it in public, they are afraid of being judged, or being different than their friends. I'm not being something I'm not to gain followers, or to keep from losing them. That's not why I write, so the button has been deleted. I'm not interested in hosting a give away every week to bribe people into reading my blog, or linking up every other day to pimp myself out. To each his own.
Some posts on the blog are bitch fests, some posts are recaps of something we did, some posts are somethin good I ate that I think y'all should know about. But, it's all me.
So, not sure what deleting the gadget did as far as you readers who were "followers" via the button ... but you can still subscribe via your email address if you'd like.
Thanks for everything shugs!
xo
3 comments:
Amen!
All it takes is a mustard seed...If you plant the seed, GOD will water it. Soooo, even for the haters that quit following, you have planted that seed...the spirit touched them through you whether or not they want to admit it. the seed is there for God to nurture and develop in their lives going forward. I LOVED this post b/c ironically enough, we talked about a VERY similar topic at youth last night :O)
Just found your blog, wonderful post. I haven't lost any babies (yet) but cannot imagine what you're going through. Thank you for not being afraid to keep God #1, in all circumstances.
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