04 March 2013

y'all, i'm sick of thinkin

i mean, honestly, i hate it.
but, i have a really hard time turning it off.

i am tired of thinking about:
what my blood sugar is right now.
is it on the way up?
is it on the way down?
i took insulin an hour ago and still haven't eaten anything because the insulin hasn't kicked in yet - why?
what day of "the month" is it?
am i ovulating?
if i did ovulate, where did the egg go?
should i have had that caffeine?
should i have had that beer?
why are all these things such a big deal now, when back in the day people did these things, not even knowing they were bad, and we seem to have more mental, emotional, and developmental problems in children now?
how do people accidentally get pregnant?
is my analyzation more stressful than caffeine and alcohol?
how come the curl in my hair came back and then left again?
why do some become obsessed with church and then start judging people even more than before they knew as much about Jesus?
how come i used to want to blog all the time, and now, not so much?
do i miss teaching? mehh.
what is going to happen to nita nikon in the long run?
should i trust those people in new york who have her?
why do people choose to spend almost every day of the week with someone who drives them nuts and causes them to cuss?
how come people who can't even stand to be alone with their kids have them, and i don't?
why do i whine so much?
how do other people keep on keepin' on when shit gets hard?
why do i cry every time i go to church (and have done so for years)?
how can people pansy ass pussies be mean to animals? 
why do people like/hate someone because they are or are not a specified race, when in fact, they are biracial?
and on that note, why do people only focus on the details that support their argument, and ignore all the ones that don't?
why do people randomly use apostrophes, like they are optional, or just for decoration?
why do i enjoy ignoring capital letters?
why doesn't my pump have an alarm to let me know when it's completely out of insulin?

some people - men especially, it seems, have the ability to just stop thinking.
i would love to be like that.
it's what God says we should do. 
stop analyzing, and instead pray and trust.
i am a lot better than i used to be.


do you analyze?
did you find a cure for it?
how did you turn it off?

11 comments:

SMD @ lifeaccordingtosteph said...

Sometimes I have to shut my shit down and bury my head in a book to get out of my own head.

Tracy said...

Get on some good hormone regulating herbs . Estrogen dominance causes all this crap.

Southern Sass said...

I would love to be able to turn my mind off like men seem to be able to do! I over analyze all the time. I feel like Im right there with you about blogging. I just haven't been as into lately. Hopefully we get over this slump soon so we can do some posting together!

The Pink Growl said...

I had one of these cannot stop thinking sleepless nights last Thursday. I was exhausted and didn't get anything resolved with my thinking...just stressed me out!

Heidi said...

I have almost half of all of these thoughts! Especially should I have had that (5th) beer! And also the ones along the lines of why do people have kids and then complain about them?
The only thing that helps me is running or running and then drinking a bottle of wine! For reals.

Aleshea said...

Preach! When you find a cure be sure and let me know. And why does all this always happen when it's time for bed. That is what I'd like to know.

Anonymous said...

Margaritas help me turn it off.

Meredith @ Barbell Wardrobe said...

I analyze the shit out of everything, ask B. No, I can't stop I do it all the time too. Its frustrating.

Scott K. Johnson said...

So many questions, yo! And a BG check can only answer one of them! :-)

Suze said...

I wonder if Tracy is right about estrogen dominance or whatever. It would explain a lot!! I am just like this and I NEVER used to be like this. Ugh.

Kathrin@shopschoolsleep said...

I definitely have similar thoughts running thru my head...it sucks and mostly my thoughts are worries about something I can't even control. At least you can get them out on your blog and know that you're not alone *hugs*