On this day, two years ago, me & Anj Pie were at our wedding reception, eating BBQ and dancing to the Cupid Shuffle - well I was with lots of our friends. It was a magical day that turned out just perfectly (minus the DJ playing Here Comes the Bride BEFORE I was anywhere near walking the aisle - our friend Emma was however, so she walked down while it was playing). :)
Today, I celebrated our two years of matrimony by talking to Blue Cross Blue Shield/Human Resources yet again about MY FRIGGIN NAME! Let me be clear - I DO NOT regret changing my name - however, I just want to make a brief public service announcement:
If you get married and drop your FIRST name, there WILL be hell to pay. Just be warned. When we got married, I thought I'd be lucky enough to be like any other southern chick who wants to drop a name and add her husband's last name onto the end of hers. Neggggative.
Lady @ the SS Card office: Ohhh, no, no. You can't drop your first name.
Me: What do you mean, I can't?
Ever since Sept. 11, you can't drop it.
Well, you can, but you have to go to the courthouse to do that.
Fast forward - me @ courthouse, $66, original birth certificate, marriage license, picture ID - Like 5 chicks @ courthouse - Whyyyyy do you want to do that? Umm, I want to drop it for the same reason every other chick drops her middle name. How bout you don't worrrrrrrry bout it?
The legal document literally has to be posted in public view on a bulletin board in the bottom floor of the Wake County courthouse - you know, in case one of Andrew's ex-girlfriends objects or something. (Whaaaaaaaaaaaaa?) Then, at the stroke of midnight, when the rooster crows, you throw some salt over your shoulder, drive back and get the dang Proof of Name Change document .... aka my life line.
New Birth Certificate issued - minus my first name at birth ... now my birth certificate says I was born w/ only my middle name and my last.
Thennnnnnnn I go get a new SS card, license................IN SOUTH CAROLINA.
Holy Monkey. As I watch the girl obscenely tongue down her chewing gum, and stare at my name change document while I'm ...omg...ALSO trying to come from a different state....I am just praying that God will give me a SC license with my real deal holyfield married name on it. A brief confrontation, marriage license, ss card, secret meeting in the back with the manager later, I have my SC driver's license with my real name on it. Hallelujah!
Fast forward some more --- back to NC in the Quay. Ugh. Why?! Why?! Why?!!!!
Same deal - except it was necessary to give a lesson on the fact that women, in general, sometimes, drop a name when they get married. Dude had never heard of such. So, the fact that I was dropping my first name was pretty much the antichrist. The fact that I was already "in the system" as having a NC license before under MY DANNNNNNNNG MAIDEN NAME was just tooooooooooo much to handle. 45 minutes later, showing of all the same documents mentioned above....I get the slip of paper saying what my license will say when it arrives in the mail 10 days later....in this order: MIDDLE MARRIED MAIDEN .....whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat? NO NO NO NO NO !!!!!!!!!
My most recent events of 2011 include fixing my name on my email at work, fixing my name on my dental insurance cards, (they said FIRST MAIDEN MARRIED - NOPE - NEVER WENT BY THAT NAME) ... and today.......working to get my name fixed on my health insurance card WHICH WAS ALREADY RIGHT TO BEGIN WITH. BCBS lady had NO IDEA why they felt the urge to randomly mail me out new insurance cards with the wrong name on them. HOLY CANOLI! If Anj ever cheats on me or one of us gets hit by a truck - I can't ever change my name again. I just can't.
I love Anj so much. I look at some married couples - and some people who have been married for 40 years and I think, "Wow. Some people go through their entire lives and have NEVER found what God has blessed Andrew and me with." I cannot think of anyone that I'd like to trade with. That IS NOT to say we are perfect by any remotely fuzzy stretch of the imagination. The beauty is in appreciating those things that are difficult/irritating/disturbing (lol) as reasons to grow closer. For example, Andrew Davis LOVES HIM SOME PERSONAL FINANCE AND EXCEL. Me? I'd rather pluck my eye lashes out one at a time. But really - the key for us so far is to always remember to play. Is anything really serious enough to cause you to jeopardize what you have at home? The skeezer at work or job promotion or your girl friends are NOT the greener grass on the other side! I feel that we have been blessed to have been given a spouse with which we can share life's good and bad. If you can't laugh at yourself and the situation, you gone have a rough road.
I think we also choose to look at every situation as a way that God is building our marriage and our character and using that to draw us closer to Him. Besides, no one likes a whiner. #15, work to keep things "alive". Do you have to be a size 2? No. But is it attractive to be with someone who cares how he/she looks? Who has ambition to feel good and be healthy and there for you when you need em? Yes. NO ONE WANTS TO HEAR YOU RAMBLE ON AND ON FOR YEARS ABOUT CALORIES AND RUNNING AND HOW UGLY YOU ARE. Like Hazel says: Only a dog wants a bone. (love) Being comfortable in your own skin and having confidence is the hotness, friends!
I also think about the difference between mature love and that over-the-top delusional with lust "love". I truly feel like Anj is the other half of me. I can't imagine doing anything to intentionally hurt him, as that would be like shooting myself in the foot, and who wants that? I want my husband happy and feeling cherished. :) I love Anj so much that it's hard for me to imagine that I could ever love our children as much. To me, he is the cutest widdle thing God ever made and put on this earth. I could go on for quite awhile, but I will stop so
A) you don't vomit
B) Anj doesn't get really embarrassed and scold me for putting all this on here
Anj makes me feel safe and loved and taken care of. I never have to wonder how he feels about me. He always makes sure that I know. We work really hard to make time to have fun together. I am SO BLESSED to have him!! Anj does sweet, thoughtful, amazing things for me all the time, and I truly feel that he is on my team - through everything - thick and thin.
If you got a good man (or woman) - BE GRATEFUL and thank God for them EVERYDAY! Make sure your shugpie KNOWS how much they mean to you. Don't just save it up for Valentine's Day and the Anniversary.
I <3 Anj Davis forever and ever and ever x 23985083753587340958734
Happy "Anj"iversary shug! (I stole this from my Aunt Sherry - don't be a haterrrrrrr).