19 July 2013

Target Nights and ho shorts for juniors.

Know what I love?
Target Nights.
Where you go to Target, get some Starbucks, and just walk around with no time limit - alone, or maybe with a Target-minded girlfriend - and do just that, browse. No naggin' to go home. No "Have we gotten everything on the list? Then, why are we still here?"
I texted hubs yesterday at 4:30 to let him know I was goin' to Target and get some Starbucks and browse.
"Ok," he said.

Two hours later, I return home.
"Where have you been?"
"Target," I answered, confused. Didn't he text me back 'ok' when I told him I was goin' to Target?
"This whole time?"
"Umm, yeah."

Target Nights are a big deal to me. You see, I avoid Target like the plague because it is a brilliant marketing scheme geared toward sucking women in by putting magical scarves, jewelry, clutches, polish, eye shadow mascara, etc near the front, and then leading you from there into magical office supplies and house wares trap.
So, yes, I avoid it. Unless ...
I have birthdizzle gift cards {to Target & Starbucks!!}. Big thanks to la familia.

Here's what I came home with:

 photo chambray_zps6e599f92.jpg

Yep. Finally got a chambray. See, I'm picky. Button downs can't be too tight in the shoulder. They have to have a dab of stretch, and not hug my fat, but need to hug my boobs a little.
This one:
Soft. Knows where to be snug, and where to be lose. Doesn't try to pop off when I stretch my arms. Good job, Merona.

 photo chambray2_zps09af1349.png
I wanted some nail polish in the "mango" family.
Didn't have luck finding anything involving "mango" in the name.
Also, I don't pay more than $3.50 for nail polish, $5 on a crazy day.
So, I got me some Sally Hansen Peachy Breeze.
 photo chambray4_zpsffbec915.png
Shorts. 
Can we talk about how much I hate shoppin' for shorts?
Juniors' = ho shorts.
Women's = down to your knees.
And, I have a big butt, but my thighs don't really match up proportionally. Sooo, if they fit in the waist, they are too big in the booty.
But, if I go up a size so that they do fit in the booty, they are just too big and look ridic.
But, these, that are ,in fact, from the junior department, work - with a belt anyway.

And this, my friends, is what is goin' on in most of the junior department.
I feel sorry for you parents of teenage girls. Everywhere sells ho clothes. What the dealy?
See, this lovely pic on the left is from online. Those shorts totally look like they at least cover your ass cheek crease, no?
 However, the pic on the right is how hooch-tastic these shorts actually are. Lookin' like some panties.
PS - WTH are yoga shorts?

 photo chambray6_zps9adadbf0.jpg

Da Efff?

And that, is how my Target Night played out.

What magical things have you gotten at Target lately?
No, nevermind. Don't tell me. I don't need encouragement.


4 comments:

Anonymous said...

hold on to your ho shorts because we *just* got target in toronto (like, a few months ago) so i totally get your target nights. the only thing that sucks large is that we don't have US target prices so a top that would normally cost $9 in the states cost $20 here in canada.

in fact, today i have a day off so i plan to head over to target and walk around for the afternoon looking at everything!

Meredith @ Barbell Wardrobe said...

I dont understand why guys do not understand the magicalness of la Target. hours on hours can be spent there. my outfit today was provided by Target! if you don't like the color of polish you bought I've got to recommend the Sally Hansen Hard as Nails Xtreme Wear Coral Reef. love love love it on my toes, just purchased by 2nd bottle.

Misty, Handbags + Handguns said...

I spent $50 there yesterday on crap. I really want to go back and get a jean jacket I tried on. I just know if I want to pay $35 for it. #whitegirlprobs

Always in a Southern State of Mind said...

I have a target addiction. When I lived in NC, we'd have to drive 45 minutes to get to one, and now out here in AZ, there's five within 3 miles of one another.

My checking account hates me.

I just went yesterday and spent $30 on stuff.

I don't even remember what all I bought, but I just know that one minute I had a giftcard and the next... I was walking out with three bags in a targaze.

Holy Ho shorts!