31 October 2012

some thoughts on age

we celebrate quite a few birthdays in our families between october and november.
there's also been loss, and some sad news recently.
and at the same time, there have been several births and several reasons to celebrate.

it got me to thinking about life, and age and what it really means.

anj and i are both 29, and several of our friends have already turned 30 or will very soon. people are like, "OMG. The big three-oh."
but why? it's another day. a day to be celebrated. not a time to bitch and whine about everything you don't have and you haven't done.

maybe your childhood sucked and your adulthood is everything you dreamed it would be.
maybe you went through some serious shit, and you hit your rock bottom.
maybe now, as an adult, you are doing what you love everyday and getting paid for it.
maybe you're not. but maybe you have a wonderful family, or wonderful friends, or better yet, some of each to share this life with.
maybe you have perfect health and appreciate it. maybe you have perfect health and take it for granted because you are too busy concentrating on something else.
maybe you have shitty health, but can still say that you are genuinely happy over all.
things are all about perspective, aren't they? 
 i think that a positive outlook is something that you have to want, and seek out. it doesn't just happen. sometimes a positive outlook involves getting negative people and dead ends out of your life, even if it hurts at first. for me, a positive outlook took a lot of prayer. and i try very hard to see the positive in every situation. if you make yourself do it for awhile, it starts to come naturally.

some people say all they want is for their kids to be happy.
well, i don't.
i think that's selling them short.
you cannot give your kids happy. and the more you try to mold the situation to make them happy, or buy it for them, the more you are preventing them from learning and growing.
life is about obstacles. things beyond our control.
sometimes our feelings are hurt, or we are given the raw end of the deal.
but, it teaches us to be grateful and have compassion.

and we become obsessed with physical appearance, more so as we age.
i weigh more than i used to. but, i don't hate my body. i'm grateful for the body God gave me. the only people who look cute skinny as hell and shaped like a tampon are 15 year old girls.
to me, my husband gets better looking with age.
my mom looks better now than she did when she was young and skinny as a rail.
i think what's attractive is your attitude, and taking care of your body, even if you aren't a size 6.

i had a friend once who was devastated to turn 25. she was also the friend who ran all. the. damn. time. not attractive. i wanted to smack the shit out of her.

i personally, am loving 29. i love being married. i'm truly happy now. i'd love to have a child, but I also know that my marriage is a blessing that not everyone has.

i know women with great grandkids who can admit they've never known what it was like to be truly head over heels in love. to be best friends with your husband. to have fun every single day. to make each other laugh. there are also women who are grandmothers who will not get out of their house to have some fun with their girlfriends because they are a slave to routine. they are terrified the house will fall apart with them gone away for a weekend. or maybe they are terrified it won't fall apart without them there to run everything?

i love home. i love making meals together. making things to take to reunions, and get togethers. i like that we are in the age of going to shows and being home by 12 instead of getting started at 12. while i enjoyed high school and college, i have no desire to go back. maybe for a day, but i'm sure i'd be ready to get back to where i am now.

i like decorating our home. folding our laundry. the sound of the dishwasher running. the best part of my day is snuggle time with anj in our white t-shirts, while we each read our respective books in bed or on the couch, with a fire going if it's cold enough. my favorite shoes are my ll bean mocassins. i don't buy things with a high heel because they make my back hurt. i also do not buy things that have to be ironed. life is too short to spend time doing something you hate so you can look cute. to all you ladies without back pain and who love to iron, march on, shugpies!

some people die when they are 15. some take their own lives because they are miserable. some die having the time of their lives. other people finally learn to live when they are 45. they learn that you can't please everybody, but you can be kind and do what's good for your health and your soul.

what do you think? what does age mean to you?


Tracy said...

Bless you!

Much to My Delight said...

I simply loved this post.

Abigaylemae said...

I loved it too...What a great post :O)