31 December 2012

greetings, 2013

my first thought was, 'nothing super eventful happened in 2012. i mean, nothing worth blogging about anyway.'
but, that's a lie.
every day, every month, every year, is a learning experience, and some things realized, some things lost, some things gained.

in 2012, 
i let go and let God ... move me to somewhere i had major hesitations about at first.
after a bunch of back and forth about jobs and work and what to do,
i just said, 'screw it.'

i'm happy now.

i gave up a job that i thought i'd wanted forever.
i took another job similar to it in a new city.
that job was taken away before my first day of teaching.

a month later i found out i was pregnant.
i felt extreme joy.
and extreme uneasiness and fear.

four weeks after finding out i was pregnant, 
i found out it was ectopic.
i had surgery hours later.
i cried a lot.
i thanked God for getting me through it,
and for giving me a positive prognosis for the future.
 {are y'all sick of reading about the ectopic?
because i'm sick of thinking about it/writing about it,
but it's still a thing in my world right now, so thanks for stickin' around.}

i finally got my a1c below 6.
5.8 !!!!
i thanked God some more.

i learned that there is no such thing as a normal family.
everybody's has got somethin'.
love 'em anyway.
i learned it's okay to do what feels best for your own marriage/family.
even if that means your family and friends don't always get it.
 choose space,
and time with your husband,
if that's what you and your husband want and need.
life's too short to stay busy with stuff that makes you irritated and unhappy.

i saw my husband in a whole new light.
turns out it is possible to wake up everyday and love him more than i did the day before that, 
or the day before that, 
or the day before that.
sometimes yucky times are also times for you to feel someone's love in a different way than you ever have before,
because they have an opportunity to show you that love in a different way than they ever have before.

i feel like i know who i am again.
i haven't felt like this since high school.
maybe this sounds strange to some people.
i learned that caring what people think doesn't change it,
so why waste your energy?

i learned that no matter what you do,
somebody will be judging.
or be pissed.
or irritated.
again, i learned that caring what people think doesn't change it,
so why waste your energy?

i have a lot more free time than i used to.
and although i'm not as busy with stuff stress,
i can think about what's around me.
i can appreciate it.
i can learn to be who i am and say no sometimes.

what i do or don't do for a living is not who i am.
my diabetes is not who i am.
having a baby is not who i am.

thanks to God for seeing things ahead of time.
for setting it up perfectly.
for letting me know i'll be okay.
for giving me the most amazing husband.
a husband i could have never dreamed up.
he's all the things i needed and wanted,
even before i knew it.

here's to 2013,
the next 365 days,
the good,
the bad,
the scary,
the sad,
the frustrating.
may we be blessed enough to grow from it,
and be a little bit more of what God intends us to be.

______________

and the resolutions, well, i just want to get back on the wagon that i fell off of recently:

i need to get back to some form of exercise - loved my daily walks and i let the weather talk me out of it, then holidays came, and now i am totally derailed.

and gluten, been cheatin' like a mo on that.
no bueno.

other than that, i'ma keep livin' how i'm livin'.

new year's eve bonfire tonight, y'all!
whoop! whoop!
remember last year's bonfire/oyster roast?

this year's pics will be sans Nita Nikon, but we will survive.

happy new year's eve, friends!
be safe!

7 comments:

The Pink Growl said...

How fun to ring in the new year with a bonfire! I love it! 2012 was an interesting year full of lessons for us both seems like, here's to hoping 2013 has nothing but happiness to offer us gal! XOXO

Sarah Kil said...

Hey Beth,
Thanks for sharing your 2012 recap!
I loved what you wrote about seeing your husband in a different light and then loving him more everyday because of it. I think that's absolutely beautiful :)
I hope and pray for an amazing 2013 for you and your family!


Sarah
lovesarahk.com

Suze said...

Sounds like you really had a full year and that you are much better for it. Look at all the lessons you learned! Thanks for sharing your wisdom. Here's to 2013!

Amanda @ The Barstows: Our Little House on the {West Texas} Prairie said...

Walking is the greatest exercise! I am in the same boat as you, I was so good about it until the weather got cold and holidays came around..but I have faith in the spring weather to get me back outside again!

Mrs. Crawford's Class said...

Here's to 2013! Love you girl!

SMD @ lifeaccordingtosteph said...

Beautiful writing, friend. Happy New Year!

Betty said...

Hi, I just discovered your blog...and realized we have a few things in common. First off, my name is Beth too (but I go by Betty on my blog). Second, I lost a baby in 2012 as well...and it's been a rough year...but we are hopeful for good things in the future. Wishing you a happy 2013! Now following!