... childhood. Hours upon hours of playing outside. Bikes. Being tan. Having a high metabolism. Dreaming of being a fashion designer. Making clubhouses. Playing at the pool. My blood sugars not fluctuating every month.
... my meemaw's bluish gray Ford Escort. I can remember the sound of it pulling up in the driveway. Sumbitch had like 250,000 miles on it at least.
... living in Berry Hall with my Berry Hall shugpies.
... my friend Ashley. I still talk to her fairly often, but she lives too far away.
... and my friend Lauren. Again, just too far away.
... believing in Santa.
... when Sex and the City was new every week.
... when I was small enough for my uncle to pick me up and lift me up to the ceiling when he came in for lunch.
... when my granddaddy would ask me to pull his boots off for him (took all the strength I had, and then when I finally got them off, I'd go flying across the room). Then I'd ask him if I could comb his hair and he'd let me, with one of those tiny black barber's combs.
... the leather smell of the drawer in my granddaddy's bathroom - it's where he kept all his old wallets.
... watching Little House on the Prairie, Matlock, and The Golden Girls when my mama was my granddaddy's secretary.
... how carefree high school was. Everything could be solved with a can of Diet Mt. Dew, and a ride up and down the boulevard in my Honda.
... my great aunt Geraldine's house on Christmas Eve. And her biscuits.
... Buster & Elnora's house at 6:30 am on Christmas morning. And oyster stew, even though I didn't eat it. And bluegrass music in the front room.
... cookouts at my aunt & uncle's house when my cousins were still small and we still lived just through the woods.
... when Darius Rucker was still part of Hootie & the Blowfish.
... kids being able to play outside for a long time, without you having to worry that something awful has happened to them.
... mud-slingin' in the middle of the night, and then eating grease at Timberland afterward.
... being able to drink all the beer I want without anxiously awaiting the stomach pains and hair loss that come with it.
... James, Patch, Prissy ... my sweet furry babies.
... not thinking about babies. My babies. Friends' babies. Pregnancy. Clomid. Ovulation. Implantation bleeding. #STFUbrain
... my natural curl.
... the sound of the attic fan at my granddaddy's house. I want a house with an attic fan. And a screen door.