11 February 2011

Rock & Roll or Ryyyyyyyyyyyye. Go away Snotty!

The lovely array of bulb syringes, giant bottle of steroid/saline nasal irrigation compound, mini bottle of nasal emollient and 30 cc measuring cup are how I've been livin' since last Friday, Feb. 4th. Sooo....in the last blog, when Andrew and I had a magical Raleighwood Sunday....yeah, the madness started that night. So, I go to the dr. tell him all about my sinus funk, crackling sound in my ear, snot factory madness the Friday after that - 5 days later. After a hearing test (left ear's just fine), two vials of blood drawn, and a lovely chat about how kids will ruin your health...off to the compounding center I went to get the nasal irrigation made. This involves me putting the little cupful (30 cc's) in my nose twice a day and then blowing it all back out. It's real attractive. You know it's love when your husband watches you and hands you another tissue to blow it out and helps you drop in it your nose while you lay with your head hanging off the edge of the bed. At this point - there was no infection. Yay!

The following Tuesday night....9 days into the madness - the fever/chills start. Great. I try the flu/severe cold concoction above - psych! Did NOOOOOOOOOOOOOTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The coughing is gettin' started up real good by now. During one of my classes, I was coughing so hard I had to get up and walk around the room. I had to grab a kids shoulder making the "please get out of the way before I choke motion" - "Mrs. Davis! Are you okay?! Do we need to get somebody?" Ugh. So...I realize I have some of this cough syrup left over from last summer when I got a respiratory infection which lasted for 2 weeks and I nearly coughed myself to death...like 2 hrs sleep/night coughing. I had to sleep downstairs on the couch sitting up and Andrew could still hear me coughing all night up stairs. It was ridic. So....neither of us could get the dang top off - soooooooooooo Anj broke out the knife.

This is how we stored what was left.

The doctor calls back - thank God - they called in some antibiotics for me. This is how it went:

Me: Hellloooooooooo (sounding like death's doorstep)
Nurse: Well, Beeeeeth .... Honey you sound like a Frawwwwwwwwwg! Well, we got somethin called in for ya.
Me: Thanks. I appreciate it.
Nurse: You poor thannnng. Bless your heart.

Also, an undisclosed source recommended this:

She said to get Rock & Rye - it's a bourbon with fruit in the bottom. Take you a shot 2 - 3x/day. Especially when you wake up and before you go to bed. It'll break up the phlegm (gross word) which is causin the nasty cough. NOTE: This only works for those paiiiiiiiiiiiinful coughs that feel like your throat splits open and bleeds when you cough. She made no mention of honey ( 1 of the 3 main ingredients in the regular "homemade cough syrup") I don't think the point of this is to soothe - it's just supposed to crack that mess up so you can hock it up. Bleck! PS - I HATE taking shots! Gross! Gross! Gross! But I did it anyway. AFTER going to two ABC stores b/c apparently it's normal around these parts for people to open their store whenever the heck they feel like it - regardless (not irregardless) of what the hours say ON THE DOOR!

My husband found this fascinating -

1) it was recommended by name
2) he'd never heard of it
3) there's a lemon in it
4) he googled it at work to get his learn on - (he loves doing that) - he read that the 'rock' comes from the fact that it is made from dissolved rock candy.

Hmm....may ought to check my blood later for hidden suggggarrrrrrrrrrrrrsssss.

There - I did it. I added A LOT of lemon juice to the shot glass before I drank it. Afterwards, I felt motivated enough to go shower. My husband will be excited. My intestines are just now starting to not burn.
Also, I just sneezed and it felt AWESOME!

Oh - I also learned that I am allergic to cats, dogs and dust mites. Whaaaaaaaaaaaat? Maybe I'll feel good enough later to vacuum up some dust mites. Lil bastards. Where are dust mites? Do they live everywhere?

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