Halloween costumes should not be bought as one piece

I think I can thank my mama for my love of Halloween. When we were kids, our costumes were not some random last minute purchase. {There was no Walmart. Roses was it. And even so, a random store-bought costume was just not gonna get it.}

We would scavenge closets - our closets, her closet, my grandparents' closets, aunts' and uncles' closets - whosever to get what we needed to feel that the mission had been accomplished. One time, Mama used orange food colorin in my little brother, Eric's hair because he was a pumpkin that year. Took a week to completely wash out.

You can see below that I am one awesome gypsy.

And that lil fella is my brother. Truth be told, at that age, he dressed like that everyday, minus the 'stache. Tool belt, too. Although, I don't think Mama would let him wear it to school.
The cowgirl is my friend Amanda. She would often go with us.
{What is Eric tryin to steal from Amanda's pocket?}

Amanda - a hippie. Me - Cher? Another hippie?

 Eric - the pirate.

Those floral pants that Amanda's wearing are mine. I totally rocked them in 5th grade on the regular. Those polka dotted ones that I'm wearing too.

I remember we would always get cheeseburgers and hotdogs from Stuart's and get an early start. You see, we didn't go door-to-door. My mama drove us all over the county to people's houses that we knew. Being diabetic, they always had something special for me. Everything from baggies of change, pencils, erasers, stickers, Lisa Frank notebooks, sugar-free gum, to turnips. And any candy that I couldn't eat would be brought home and sold to my uncle for the price of $5.

Thanks, Buck.

Love Halloween.

I still love the magic of it even now.
Posting this year's pics later in the week.

GOOTNESS gracious!

what. a. Tuesday.

Today is Tuesday, right?

I don't know if it's the "cold" or the time change or what, but at night, after I eat supper, I feel like I've had 2 or 3 Benedryls. It is all I can DO to stay awake. Boo.

So, last night, I was excited to be goin to bed at

9:15.

Well, there certainly won't no need in gettin excited. Because I woke up SIX times to Peggy singin DOO DOO DOOOOO and her gettin her vibrate on. Thank you, Peggy the Pump. EVERY TIME I corrected the high BS (blood sugars ;) ), it'd beep again in 2 hours, EVEN HIGHER THAN BEFORE. Awesome. Thank you.  All the while feelin like I'm gonna ralph, as this is one of the side effects of high BS. What THE deuce?

Bein high just continues on into my work day ... yep, higher and higher. Then, a magical NO DELIVERY message on my pump, AND double arrows up, which = "yo blood sugar is goin up not just real fast, but SUPA fast, girl! You betta handle dis!" Life is more fun when you imagine your insulin pump has a personality and talks like a middle aged black woman.

Bottom line, I had to leave work. Thank God I work with people who understand that diabetes can be unpredictable, and it's something that needs to be dealt with right away.

Went home. Changed the whole pump site. Looked like something maybe stuck in the reservoir set. My tissue/flesh? Sure, let's go with that. Who knows?

Upload sugars online so my endo can look at em.

Type her up a long explanation of all the temporary basals and adjustments I've been making to accomodate for my hormones doing special shiz to my blood sugars so that when she looks at the sugars, she will have some foggy clue (hopefully) of what she is lookin at. Fingers crossed.

Email said explanation to my mama so she can fax it to the dr. from her work b/c I am no longer at work, and we gots no fax machine at home, annnnnd, my dr. doesn't do email because of some HIPAA sitch. But wait - she can't open it because it's some doc type that her Adobe doesn't like. Ugh! Oh! This just in - it opens in google docs. Thank you for bein your own man, google.

Time out: 
I want y'all to know that right now, as I am tryin to type this post, my 80 lb. black lab has crawled across my lap, like he might be some tiny pug or somethin.  What isssss the deal?  Needy.  And he's been with me half the day.




At least I am certain Sir Bro Bro loves me regardless of my diabeetus or ugly TB arm bubble. He has regained control of himself and is now back in the floor.



Movin on ..

Drive to HR for my work to pick up a packet for orientation, where I am photographed, and asked to submit my license into some machine to verify my ID before I am allowed back there. TO PICK UP AN ORIENTATION PACKET in a manilla envelope.  No, I don't work for the FBI. Whaaaaaaaaat? Have we officially reached balla status around here or what?

Stop at Chicfila for a low carb meal so I can hopefully keep my blood sugars below 300 until my dr (hopefully) figures out something that makes sense.

Fly to the urgent care so I can get a required TB test for job which is required prior to orientation.

Get flu shot while I'm there.

Go to CVS to get Rx that is totally unrelated to the madness, I guess. Wait. Have cute redheaded pharmacist in her lil pearl earrings come to the window and immediately start tellin me about how she's tryin to override somethin or other but the medicaid this and that. Say Wha? I hated to interrupt her, but I had to. I was like, "Honey, I don't have any idea what you're talkin about. I just pulled up. I need to pick up the prescription I called in earlier." Bless her heart. She was so embarrassed. I have noticed I have started to call people "Honey" lately, even when they are at least 10 years older than me. What is happening to me?

Now, here I am. At home with the dog. Chillin. Feelin like my blood is low because it's been so high for so long that normal levels feel whack. We'll see how long they stay like this before decidin to get high again. I am not a fan. Get over yourself, estrogen-insulin resistance.

Pro - crassssssss

Things I Should Be Doing That I Ain't

1) Studying for two major tests that I have in T minus 2 weeks that affect my career that I paid $220 to take

2) Taking a shower since I walked Brady like four hours ago and sweated like the funk after already sweating half the day at work because the AC was broken

3) Calling the Spay/Neuter people ... who are called SNAP ... weird ... for Brady Doesn't it feel nice to get things done? I think I may have said, "Brady, what are you doing, you Suga Pie?" at the end of the message - I thought I'd hung up already. Whoops.

4) Studying.

5)Putting laundry away. 

6) Getting mess ready for my Jason Aldean T-shirt

7) Studying.

8) Vacuuming out the back of my car (cancel that - now it's thunderin & lightnin)

Crap I'm Doing Instead

1) Writing this random as all get out blog post

2) Thinking about what I could wear to the next State game and hoping it'll be cooler

3) Thinking of how I'm going to use my NC State Howl Towels to decorate my room

I may have scavenged them from all over the ground while leaving the game. Don't worry. I washed em, duh!

4) Thinking about the strange twist of luck I've had as of a few hours ago that I don't want to talk about because I'm always afraid of being jinxed

5) Read other people's blogs and wonder WTH they have 3000 followers (Hey - what am I sayin? I clearly only have 21, right? ;) Could this mean that a lot of people don't like me in real non-cyberspace life too?!?! )

6) Watchin Picker Sisters ... I want that life.

7) Thinkin Fantasizing about the Jason Aldean concert. 

8) Wondering what it would be like to be a Pistol Annie

9) Smiling about the fact that our KFC greasy chicken supper came in a Wolfpack bucket tonight: (can y'all tell I'm mega excited that football season is finally here?)

10) Thanking God above for the cooler weather today and listening to the rain just pourrrr down. Man, it sounds delicious!

11) Wishing I wouldn't have drank so much Diet Mt. Dew today. (Is it grammatically correct to say "wouldn't have drank"? Ionno. Make fun of me in the comments if it ain't right. I don't feel like further investigation.) I couldn't help maself. I was about to fall asleep allll. day. long.

12) Listening to Brady D-VOUR his bone. Friends, it is INTENSE. He's so good, he don't EVEN need his hands.

Y'all have a good night and for the love, do something productive. I added the label "lists" to this because this is just how my brain works naturally. Is it just me?!? I feel lots of lists comin on in the future. Call me nutso, but I think we all assume other people's brains work like ours. For example, my mama imagines long term dates as an oval shaped "calendar" ... I guess sort of like how the planets orbit?? ... Whatttt?!? I totally picture a calendar sheet for the month we are in right now...with further dates (be they past or present) as points further down a timeline. Who the hell thinks/talks of things such as this you ask? My fam. 

Mama's brain:

Further - I think all essays and writing used for testing purposes should be accepted in list form only. So direct. To the point. Why are you the right candidate for this job? What do you need from the store? Why does NC State rock? For what reasons do you feel a test should be required to reproduce and to vote? 

 etc.

Just Thow it in There, Thursday

WARNING:
This post contains rambling, random re-caps and photo overload. Thank you, enjoy your stay.

I. am one sorry blogger. I haven't blogged in over a week. I know. I suck. But - I've had stuff goin' on. (Not important stuff, but stuff). So, if you are reading here today, I thank you. Thank you for not giving up on me.

Here's the excitement that has been my life and the reason for my blog neglect (Warning. It's all totally lame.):

1) I have been sleepy everyday for 3 weeks. I am trying to free myself from the hold of Diet Coke and Diet Mt. Dew. It SUCKS. So, after work, and tutoring, and draaaaaaaggin my fatness to the gym, I talk to Anj, and crawl into my heated mattress pad bed which makes my lower back stop hurting, and drift off into my coma, until I have to drag myself back out the next mornin.

2) I discovered this website and I feel that I may be a mother just like this,  A Momma's Desires and Pacifiers I don't think I can be fake long enough to be a happy, singing, khaki-and-button-down-shirt-wearin kind of mama. More like, "I am telling you NO now. And if I have to tell you this again, the answer is STILL NO, and YOU WILL get ya bottom TOE up! Do you hear me?"

3) I have been resisting the urge to drink a nice collllld Diet Mt. Dew from the vending machine which is just steps away my friends. Just a few. short. steps. (when I am at work) orrrrr a nice cold Diet Coke which is just right there IN THE FRIDGE at home.

4) I went to North Myrtle for Memorial Day and had the following experiences:




Yummy produce/homemade goods/ice cream/meats/little grill place on the way down.

Once we arrived ...

Supper that night ...

In 10 minutes, dude NEVER actually lit the cigarette.

Bike Week ...

Ticket?! Whatchu mean I was revvin' it up?

there are no words ...

Beach Music at Duck's ...

And afterward ...

Tent is CLUTCH when it comes to being on the beach for all day lonnng ... thanks Coopers!

When Anj takes pictures, it's "Go!" - no warning whatsoever.

Carolina cooler under NC State tent = CLEARLY we needed more room for our foods and bevs. Thanks Hayden! ;)

All you can eat crab legs ...

Please know that Anj Davis got his money's worth for realz. Loves him some crab legs.

Walkin around at Barefoot Landing ...

5a) Clearly, I'm a failure for having to be reminded to mention this little discovery/new love:

+

+

+

=

Straight Memorial Day/Bike Week Magic

....

or, as Lois Ellen and I so dubbed this new Heaven-In-Your-Mouth:

THE Arnold D'Andre Palmer

Drank one for me, Shuga!

6) I made chicken salad. Time consuming. A separate post.

7) I have been feeling grouchy/whiny (again) about my diabetes and being a girl and how together, I want to get a machine gun and fire away at both of them until I am back to optimal health.

8) I have been feeling guilty about not blogging.

9) Sylvia went to Brotha Man E's Car Service and got a new Fuel Assembly AND a new crank position shaft. She is so spoiled with her tantrums. I think she wrecks herself for the attention.

10) I have been thinking about how my legs aren't as shapely as they used to be.

11) After thinkin about the lack of shapeliness of my legs - and the rest of me - I feel guilty and go to the gym, where I feel angry because my Sweet Lil Buds for my ipod are faulty. I CANNOT use the HU-FRIGGIN-MONGOUS ear thingies that come with the ipod because my ear holes are notttttttttt that large. IT BLOWS MY MIND THAT ANYONE'S ARE. Anyway, I guess one of the ear buds got too sweaty and just kicked the bucket. Note to self - go buy new earbuds.

12) I have been freaking out about how snakes are for real. I have spent A LOT of time thinking about how God made snakes too. They won't hurt you unless you hurt them. What's the chance of actually seeing one? Etc. But then, I realize these are all actually falsehoods. And - my aunt sent me this in an email and I am still seeing the images flash vividly in my mind at random points throughout the day:

Look who tried to come up in here today. He was not even a foot away from my shoe & tried to come in when I opened the door to see why the dogs were having a fit.

 Then, FIVE DAYS LATER, she sent me this in an email:

Guess his widow came looking for him.

WHAT. THE. DEUCE. FRANDS? EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

13) I've been dreaming of going to Texas. And boots. And cowboys. And Junk Gypsies. And Lauren M. M. B. C. (in true southern form, she has five names - only married once, though. ;) )

14) I've been missin the Shimmer Lotion that Jergens used to make. It didn't cost an arm and a leg and it helped make your legs look yummy and toned. Jergens - Why?! Why?! WHY?!

15) I have spent a total of ~ 8 hours at Verizon. In two days. But I got this, which I am still learnin about. I am not tech savvy.



16) I have been working with fellow in-laws and hubs to plan a fish fry at Ma and Pa Davis's. My task: potato salad.

17) I have been reading trash like People magazine and thinking how flippin' HIDEOUS Kim Kardashian's ring is. Who knew she had a boyfriend? Why are they even famous? Are they divorced yet?

18) I have been spending a lot of time being jealous of people born with beautiful thick hair. Then I remember that I even have hair, which is enough to be grateful for. And I shut the front door.

19) Wondering - how do omens/good signs start? I think they run rampant in the south. Mama is whacked out because she saw a dead red bird. I told her not to worry, I once murdered one with my friend's truck, and the bird's corpse rode quite a ways down 49 in the grill. Nothin bad happened. Good actually. I met my hubs after a ROUCH one year+ of jackwagons. However, I heard an owl several weeks ago. On two different nights. Somebody did die. Thankfully, it was just Osama's dumbass.

20) Trend Alert: My mama went to the dentist this week, and was readin Redbook in the waiting area, and learned that some sneaky researchers secretly determined what men search for on the internet regarding the lady folk, and the study found that men look most for middle aged women who are curvaceous and have somethin to hold onto. So, in my mama's words, "Young skinny b*****s are out and middle-aged women with some meat on 'em are in!" REJOICE! Good knews, because I know I got some parts that just are what they are no matter how long I'm at the gym or how many biscuits I resist. Whoop! Whoop!

I am ashamed to say that by the end of this post, I have in fact, opened a delicious, cold, beverage of the Diet Mountain Dew variety. And let me just say, the can is so cold, I cannot hold it without a koozie. The DMD is icy, refreshing, and like glitter in my veins. I am not proud of myself, for I have fallen off the wagon. Tomorrow is another day.

Dear Mama ...

On this Mother's Day weekend, I just wanted to let you know ...

that as I get older, and start to think of havin babies of my own, I am more and more appreciative of my own wonderful mama, my meemaw, my dear sweet aunts, and really, all the ladies in my life who have loved, guided, supported and tolerated me at times when that mess won't easy! God has truly, truly blessed me.

How precious! Mama at her baby shower for me!

My childhood is filled with memories that I will always treasure. And, I am proud to come from the family that I do. While life's circumstances weren't always perfect, and we may not have always agreed on every detail, the love has always been there.

I love you Mama! I hope I am as good a mama to my babies one day as you have been to us!

So, today, I wanted to dedicate this one to my Mama and the other lovely ladies in my life who have been there for Beefy. Here are some of the things that I've learned from those fabulous women (I could never possibly capture everything ... and I'm sure there will be more things that I'll learn with each passing day):

_________________________________

Do the best you can with what you have and trust God's plan - cause His is ALWAYS better than yours.

Treat people how you'd want to be treated - not how you'd like to treat them - people you want to smack the fire out of usually have more to their story than you know about.

Nobody's perfect, and God only gives things to us that He knows we can handle.

Enjoy your naked youthful face as long as you can, because once you start wearin make up, you feel ugly without it.

You don't just marry the boy, you marry his family too - and vice versa - so choose wisely (Dear Davises - I totally don't have any regrets. ;)  )

Try to keep your arms toned and eat healthy and get exercise while you are young - everything gets more difficult physically as you age.

Raising kids isn't easy and there's no manual. Pray through all of it, and remember, they aren't really your kids - they are sweet blessings that God is trusting you to take care of when they first come into this world.

Don't turn your back on your girl friends - whether they are in a place that you don't approve of, or whether you've just taken up with the love of your life - make time for your friends - you will need those friends later, and good friends are few and far between.

If a boy ain't nice to his mama - one day, it'll be you that he ain't so nice to. (Learned this one from the boy's mama). ;)

Once a cheater - highly likely he's always a cheater. And likewise with most other things - YOU can't change a leopard's spots - like him the way he is when you marry him - he ain't gone change unless he wants to - you ain't gonna do it for him.

Put God first - then your marriage - then your kids.

Baby oil works nicely for getting a tan, and for making your legs appear very toned. ;)

Always be grateful for what you have - constantly comparing yourself to others will only make you feel like dammit. And everybody's got their cross to bear.

Respecting your husband and being grateful for all he does = happy husband = happy wife = happy life.

Don't ever show it all - leave something to the imagination.

Be kind to others - and all of God's creatures.

James was my first best friend. He followed me everywhere. Mama knew if James was gone and I was gone, then we were somewhere together. He would let me sit on him, feed him, and put bows in his hair. RIP precious James! xo

There's nothin like ridin around with the windows down on random back roads to clear your mind and help you make sound decisions.

Never say what you ain't gone do - cause you never know when you will be put to the test.

Beer (not alcohol in general) eases PMS symptoms/severe moods. So, have a couple - not 12.

You can't take care of the world when you ain't takin care of yourself.

If a black cat crosses your path, make three X's across the windshield to "undo the curse". (Boeger - not sure about lizards, sorry.) ;)

Big fluffy snow suits are cute on widdle toddlers - even if your boy toddler is wearin one made for a girl. 

Only a dog wants a bone - a man would rather have a woman who is happy with herself and loves life and loves to have fun and loves and takes care of him --- than a really hot, skinny witch. If he makes you feel like you ain't skinny, hot, tan, gorgeous enough - kick his arse to the curb.

YOU teach a man (and other people) how to treat you.

Sugar-coatin things for your friends, kids, whoever - doesn't do anything but prolong their pain. Be honest with people - especially when they ask for your advice. They will be so thankful in the long run.

There's no love on this earth like your mama's love. And, nobody - other than your husband - will love your kids one day as much as your mama.

Me and Hazel with Eric when he was brand new!

 If you don't give your husband the attention he needs - he'll find it somewhere else. *This is not to condone infidelity - but it is what it is, ladies. Plus - the Bible says to be snuggly with your husband - no excuses.

Do what you think is best for your kids and your family - pray about it - and don't let other people make you question your judgment.

Make a little time for you each day - and get a little done each day - life isn't about makin sure everything is spotless and 100% taken care of all the time. It is a simply unattainable goal.

Don't be wasteful - there's usually somethin else you can use it for, or somebody else who needs it.

There's always somebody worse off than you, so quit your pissin n moanin.

Children need and crave discipline. If you don't discipline while they are growin up - they will learn it a harder way later on down the road - one way or the other - and you will learn with them.

Always be kind to people and help out however you can - you never know what battles they are fighting or how one smile or kind word can brighten their day or help them to look at a situation differently.  

Not sure whattup with the mattress pad situation.

Let your kids be creative and be who they are. Support their dreams. It's not your job to mold them into what you want them to be. 

It is tacky to bitch at your mate/husband - you will be "that woman" that everybody hates to see show up to the party.

Remind people that you love them and that they are appreciated.

Spend money wisely.

Caffeine is bad for your skin and makes PMS 123,876,345,557 times worse.

Never teach your child to feel sorry for him/herself - you will be surprised what a child can achieve with your support and encouragement. Mama - thank you for NEVER teaching me that I was different or handicapped in some way because I was diabetic, and for still having the same standards and dreams for me as any other kid.

Structure is very important. We were usually on a tight schedule - and had clear boundaries - this has helped me immensely in life, taught me discipline, time management, and made me much more able to care for my diabetes as well.

You never get too old to stop needin Mama.

Never question God's plans - just cause you don't see your prayers answered right.this.second. doesn't mean He ain't workin on it, and got it totally under control.

Always make sure your babies know how much their mama loves em. (One way you can show them is by keeping the size of the bows in their heads reasonable. Thanks!)

There will come a time when your kids think you are the biggest idiot ever made and they will hurt you and make you feel like you've never done anything right. (Sorry Mama/Hazel).

Be careful bout the bed you make - cause YOU KNOW you gone have to lay in it.

Always make birthdays and Christmas special. Family traditions are important and a legacy that you leave for your kids.

Leaving hair color on longer in hopes of achieving a darker color = purple hair.

Food coloring in your hair for Halloween .... is semi-permanent.

Don't beat on your little brother - because he will grow up to be 6'2" when you are only 5'6" and he will also have bigger muscles.

Oops! Please ignore tape residue at the bottom of the photo.

Let your kids suffer consequences when they disobey - they will learn much more quickly this way.

Be who you are up front - being fake will catch up with you when the real you just has to come out - and usually, everybody involved loses.

Make sure all passengers who have a tendency for car sickness are seated up front when MY mama T.C. Turbo is drivin.

Spend time with kids as much as you can while they are little - they will appreciate it - and it just doesn't work that way when they get older.

Up to $150 in change can be found swimming randomly in Hazel's pocketbook at any given time.

Buy clothes that fit. Trying to stay in your 5 years ago jeans when they are too little makes you look FATTER.

A little clear nail polish makes your hands look prettier when you are goin somewhere special and you are in a hurry.

Be grateful for good sleep while you can get it. Don't waste it.

Always be there for people in times of devastation and need - being remembered for that is more important than your job or most everything else on your schedule.

Red birds (aka Cardinals ;) ) are a sign of good luck. :)

Never ever ever let your kid sleep with you. It will be so hard to get them to stop. Sorry Mama. :)

Your kids never get too old for birthday whoopins. Although - they may try to resist. :)

The best Halloween costumes are homemade. 

Cutest widdle farmer ever.

 And...

How precious is this?!?

 Mama, I will never know how hard it really is to be a mama until I have kids of my own, but as I get older, I appreciate more and more everything that you've sacrificed for me and for our family over the years and still do today! Thanks for teaching me that life is not about stuff, or about circumstances, but about loving and caring for the people who are with you on the ride.

I will always cherish the memories I've shared and the lessons I've learned over the years ... I hope I can be a magical mama to my young-uns as well one day.

Muahh!!!

Happy Mother's Day to my mama and to my meemaw and to my aunts and all the mamas and care-givers out there!!!