How deep and philosophical.
But seriously, I don't really remember why I started blogging. I didn't have any devastating life change going on that I needed to tell the world about. I wasn't making anything that everyone needed to know about. The best I can think is I love to talk, and blogging is talking via keyboard. I literally feel sometimes like I have so much junk in my head (to do lists, creative project ideas, snarks, this-is-so-amazing-I-have-to-tell-people-so-they-can-try-it's, etc, etc, etc,) that I just started writing I guess.
It's also like a virtual scrapbook. You can make it look pretty and document memories and how you were feeling about anything at anytime ... and there it is, all stored away via the internet.
But, then, you start to realize, people know who you are, and you pay attention to who is reading because they comment or tell you, "I love your blog!" (And that feels wonderful to hear.)
But along with that, comes pressure. Should I say this? Will I get fired? Who will read this and take it the wrong way and get their feelings hurt? Or get pissed off? on and on and on ...
Then, of course, you can't help but wonder, "How do people make money at this?" Well, obviously that is not my reason to continue blogging. Although, I do love you, 33 followers! xoxoxo!!
But, it's nice to get comments that people know exactly where you're coming from. Or if you could just write one post that makes people feel like they aren't the only one who feels that way. Or sharing a recipe that someone fell in love with. Basically writing anything that people can identify with makes you feel like writing that post was worthwhile. At least that's how I feel.
Although no one wants to read about someone whining 24-7, I know I appreciate you bloggers out there who tell the truth. Clearly, you can't reveal your entire life's circumstances because we have to protect our privacy - and that of others. Sometimes I'd love to write about things just to get it off my chest, but I can't. Because along with telling my own business, which I don't care who knows it, I would also be telling the business of other people involved. People I love.
So, today, friends, I am in a funk sort of a mood. My patience is being tested. I don't get why things are the way they are. I wonder if God is showing me that I made the wrong choice. I wonder if there is a such thing as being 100% certain of the decisions you make. But, I will be fine. I will have my mini pity party and then I will stop and look at all I have to be thankful for, and I will remember that GOD IS IN CONTROL. HIS PLANS ARE BETTER THAN MINE. And this is true for us all, NO MATTER THE SITUATION.
I'm thankful for these ...
Andrew * my endocrinologist * health insurance * the people I work for and with * Brody * good music * blogging (and it's free!) * pumpkin spice lattes * NC State * MY RELATIONSHIP WITH JESUS * people who love me * people for me to love * acupuncture * when I pray for God to show me how to be thankful/grateful/patient/hopeful, He does * the Raleigh Flea Market * being creative *
short and random ... there are hundreds of millions of others, clearly ...
Hope everyone has a fabulous day.