Awkward -n- Awesome

Awwwwk-ward

-1-

Having your pump go, "DOOO DOOOO DOOOOO!!" in the middle of a day-long training where they just specifically told us to turn our phones off. Then having the instructor glare you down. At which point I looked at the girl, like, "It's a medical device. I'm diabetic." Step to dis, shug!! Then she feels stupid for givin you the evil eye. 

-2-

We used to think we were the SHIZ in highschool if you had a pager. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I didn't realize just how whack this was until my husband was like, "What, y'all had pagers? What did you do with them?" Dude, there was a whole pager language, where you had to decipher messages from numbers. HAHAHAHAHAHA! Apparently in other towns, only drug dealers had pagers? 

143-7-22

I know some of you reading know what that means. Don't lie. ;)

-3-

Driving along, and the state trooper moves over into the fast lane, but he won't go fast. So, both lanes of traffic are just lingering behind/beside him. Then, as soon as he moves into a turning lane, burnin the road up!

-4-

Having your mom help you yank off your new, not-broken-in cowboy boots at the Austin airport because you don't want to hold people up, only to get up to the TSA people who say, "Next time, please leave your shoes on until you reach the front of the line. We have boot jacks in Austin."

Oh. Okay. Thanks.

 

AWESOME!!

-1-

Marrying a man who makes this heavenly concoction also known as chili (with cornbread with NO GLUTEN!!) :

-1a-

Thinking we were out of sour cream, then realizing we aren't, then having this for breakfast while watching the Today show. BAM!

-2-

FINALLY deciphering the cyclical shiz my body does with my blood sugars every month so I can somewhat get that mess under control.

-3-

New hair (even if it grows in as a baby 'hawk)! Screw you, gluten! 

-4-

Whip. Spray whip. And lots of it - in the convenience of my own home.

Visit Miss Sydney below for more doses of awkward n awesomeness.

Happy Thursday Lovas!!

Beef, Boots & Biggie

Hello Snookie Pies!

{One}

Beef

- that is me, for those of you who don't know.
Name given at approximately age 14, by my aunt presumably because it's a common nickname for shugpies named Beth, and not at all because of any physical characteristics I may possess.


timeout - WHY is Obama's voice on TV when I was clearly expectin "Charlotte Today"? Who allowed this? I think they should save one channel for all presidential ish - republican, democrat, whatev, where you can choose to listen to their shiz. Or not. Then, in the downtime, they could play music videos. Thanks.


{Two}

Boots
 

I am really drawn like a magnet to this socks-visible-with-knee-boots trend. I KNOW I would feel so dumb doing this. I told y'all the other day, this is something I'm working on. But it's everywhere. Like, this is probably happening on college campuses, and in J Crew stores and coffee shops all over Raleigh as I speak. And I really, really like it. Look how adorable this little shug pie looks over at What Would a Nerd Wear. I even stole her picture so you can see. I feel inspired and excited to get dressed every time I read her posts (this is saying a lot when I am currently lounging in my beloved Walmart yoga pants).

And I have those exact boots!

{Three}

Biggie
as in Biggie Smalls
Notorious B.I.G.
Big Poppa
Christopher Wallace

timeout again - I am sittin here at the computer gettin my blog on while men walk up to our back porch and just take our stuff and sit it in the grass so they can get their leaf-blow on. Is it weird that they can see me? I feel like I should smile and wave or offer to help. "Hey fellas, thanks for movin our stuff and blowin off our deck. Have a happy Thursday!"

anyway, back to Biggie ...

So, remember the other day when I said I was inspired by fun vintagey, thrifty shugpies like Sydney and Jentine? And how, when I finished my coffee, I was goin to Goodwill? Well, I went, and I didn't come up with any delicious belts, vintage floral dresses or cool clutches, which was sort of my entire reason for going, but I did find this:

Anybody wanna give us a full-length mirror for Christmas?

I do love me some Waylon, and Pistol Annies and Conway Twitty, but on the other extreme, I do LOVE some Biggie Smalls, y'all. And there I was, in Goodwill - staring at it for like 10 minutes, thinkin what in the deuce am I gone do with a 3XL Biggie shirt? A two dollar and 49 cent Biggie shirt? How could I say no? So, I didn't say no. I marched my little self on up to the check out with my vintage floral pillow cases and uber-feminine floral hankie and bought them and my Biggie shirt. All less than $5. Hear that, Anj Davis?

So after the following measures ... 

I did all the cuttin and tyin on the inside to shrink the shirt down, then turned it inside out (which leaves the cutting part hidden on the inside for the most part), and cut off the collar and shortened the sleeves.

And ta-dow!!:

Where will I wear this? Ionno yet. A rodeo? To the pottery shop to make homemade gifts for all my loved ones to cherish? To the Tractor Show (next weekend - so stoked!!) ... the possibilities are endless. 

PS - Boegerlicious gave me a bomb diggity Biggie shirt a few b-days back that actually fit without alterations - seen below - 

THE SHIZ, am I right?- Anj was like, "Man, how'd you get that great big shirt to look like that?!" Psh, I ain't THAT good, shug.

Tell Me If This Is Normal ...

Y'all know I said I have that test two tests THIS COMIN SATURDAY. I just opened the books today to think about studying. Even though I have had the books for weeks, and instead of getting started when I got the books or annnny time after that, I just waited until today. After I laid around allllllllll day long. I finally opened the book at like 5:30. My head started to hurt (about 30 mins. later) when I realized I don't know general historical stuff that I should know - like the Emancipation Proclamation, Manifest Destiny, the branches of the government and what they can/can't do. My husband will be SO ashamed of me when he reads this. Let's face it, when I was growin up, math and reading/writing were "important" (based on which subject areas are tested with standardized tests around these parts) and then came science. Social Studies was just randomly the leftover subject, seems like. In my world, no one cared about social studies. I wish it had been instilled in me a little better at a younger age, because as I got older, I had no foundation to add knowledge to, so I just took other classes and now I don't know squat about our country. I am disgusting. And, I was born on the 4th of July! Even worse!!! 

Yet, instead of studying, I have put the book down and decided to blog. I really think I have a mild form of ADD. I cannot and will not get anything done until I am down to the wire. And, then, when I do, I will STRESS MYSELF OUT TO THE MAX - even though it is my own doing! Like, I feel guilty and stressed right now - but I still ain't studyin. I also really struggle to pay attention when people are talking or explaining something. And, it's not that I'm not interested in what they are saying. It's like I can't even focus on eye contact while they are talking without going into another world. And, I have to read everything like 3 times if it involves explaining/teaching me something. And I absolutely CANNOT have someone else read directions/instructions to me ... I have to read it myself or you might as well be whistlin' Dixie. 

Awesome, right? 

Here's what else is goin on other than my guilt and procrastination -

I had the privilege of visitin some pig friends this weekend:

Went to Jason Aldean! Finally! I went with some lovely ladies in ma fam:

My Aunt Weeze. Aka Sandy. Look at her fab Jason T-shirt from last time she went. Ain't she cutie?

My meemaw, Hazel Sue.

(I am proud to say all women in our party wore genuine cowboy boots.)

My mega prissy Mama.

And me: Don't you love that shirt? Best part - it was ma hubs' idea!

This was the back:

People watchin at the Amphitheater/Pavilion/whatever they are callin it this week has always been a fave:

Cousin It's ready to go huntin?

Sometimes your boots hurt when you ain't had time to properly break em in:

Observed behaviors which indicate you need friends to help you draw the line:

1) wearing a dress up to your goodies and then playing corn hole so that you bend totally over, showin everything in the back, then toss the bags reallllly high, so your skirt lifts up to show everything you got in front. PSA - If you're wantin a one-night rodeo, this is the way to make it happen. If you want any sort of decent guy to show you one ounce of respect - not suggested.

2) Begin the first few songs crying while swaying/dancing with your girlfriend, and then alternating grinding yourself into two guys - pick one while the others gone to get you a drink, then switch back when he returns. Both guys leave and you begin to wrap your thighs around the girlfriend who you were cying on earlier in the night. Gross. Self-respect. Get your learn on.

3) Urinating ON THE LAWN WHERE THE CONCERT IS TAKING PLACE = it's time to cut yourself off, people.

Lord, have mercy. 

Having said all that, a good time overall!

Brady hopes you have a wonderful Monday tomorrow!

xo,

Rock Me Mama Like a Wagonwheel

Well, friends, I attended the first NC State game of the season. It was magical. I am ready for the next game like right now. 

One of my favorite things about the games is that they always play this song on the way out of the stadium after the game is over. Please listen for proper effect.

At the NC Stizzle, we are only allowed to tailgate five hours prior. Because, they are afraid we will have too much fun and get carried away and come back with guns and shoot people like that one time. True Story. #Some Ppl R Stupid & We All Pay

Well, we were the first ones at our lot. The po-po's however, decided it would be a cool time to ohhh.... basically just sit there and do nothing until TEN AFTER ONE! WTH? Check out previously stated explanation about how we don't have all day!!! Moooooooove! Stop harrassing people who are OF AGE with red and white special edition NC Stizzle brew. Geez!

I mean, is he on the phone with his wife or what? And really? What are ANY OF YOU DOING? Mooooooooove!!!!!

I needed a minute to calm down in the shade afterward. No, I did not wear the red boots because hubs thinks its the anti-christ to wear anything other than a red shirt. Well, my red shirt didn't match my red boots. I decided ... that I may go the sorostitute route and put together "an outfit" if it means I can wear my red boots. It's not that I don't appreciate a "tailgate dress", but when you have an insulin pump, you have to get creative and take into account where you are going to put your insulin pump, and still be able to get to it when you need it without liftin your skirt in public, mmmmk?

Some people had worse problems than not havin their red boots on ...

Sneaky ditch. And, errrrbody was starin. Poor things.

I LOVE so many things about the games.
1) I understand football now - minus the details about penalties.
2) I love to see people's red/white/black outfits.
3) Cowboy boots
4) I looooooove STATE! I miss it so badly. Help me think of  a legit reason to go back to school.
5) Tailgating.
6) The players' excitement when they do somethin good. Aren't they like lil kids?
7) The music that plays when the players come out or during time outs.
8) The Apache song.
9) The NC State fight song.
10) The wolf howling after a touchdown and the loud exploding cannon that goes with it.
11) People dressing/brainwashing their kids to love State from birth.
12) This could go on forever and take over the whole post. I have to stop.

Red and White all in the stands is like a natural high for me. Just gets me GOIN, y'all!!

We are also really classy at State as evidenced by the photo below - this is in all the bathroom stalls. Have no fear - this is SO not a problem anymore because liquor is not allowed during tailgating and certainly not in the stadium.

I love #winning.

The photo quality below sucks because it was taken with my phone. But I also loooove the statue of the pack of wolves on the hill. I liked how you could see the moon on the left and the wolf on the lower right. I know, I totally possess that photographer's eye, right?

What, you think it sucks? Movin' along ...

On the way out, there are po-po's disguised as regular cars like Sylvia - to regulate the peace ... and make the frats take sooooome responsibility for cleaning up the DISASTER of a mess they leave behind.

Fraternities have cool stuff like this red and white uhhh.......thing.

Anyway, I am excited for next game already. I hope all y'all other football goin blogger friends out there blogged about opening weekend because I love me some college football season. Unless you are one team in particular. I won't mention any names.

Hope everybody had a fabtabulous Labor Day weekend!

What a Fabtabulous Weekend!

Well, friends, remember yesterday, I was sayin how I went to the Most Magical Place on Earth aka The Raleighwood Flea Market? Well, I went all by maself, and got some super tasty treasures. Before I unveil, I wanted to show you how I finally did some work on this baby from this post wayyyy back:

I am a sucker for "state" stuff, especially my home state (NC represent!) or a souvie from a state I visit, hence my TX schwag.

Anyhooz, me and the bro decided to sand this beast down because I don't like shiny natural wood color = gross. I want it to be REDDDD and then a little distressed lookin. 

Bro gettin the pegs out.

Yes - I did do some work. With sand paper. Because bro thought it would be funny to watch me sand for 45 mins. before showin me the ELECTRIC sander. Thanks. xo

Sanding remnants:

After an hour of sandin WITH the electric sander. Sheww!!

REDDDD.

More on that in another post.

~~~~

Yesterday's flea market magiiiiiic: 


I love drawers. (Hehe.) Anything with compartments, sections that hold trinkets.

THIS gizmo was a RETRO hair dryer. Bought this for ma meemaw, Hazel, who used to be a beautician herself, yes indeedy - and she loves junkin as much as I do. I think that's where I get it from because NOBODY else in my family gives a flip about a flea market.

Here is Hazel Sue now ...

Totally obsessed with blue Ball jars too - but still fighting the urge to buy some because I know they will hopefully not be too hard to find at any given time.

I may or may not have purchased that rocking horse because I have a weird addiction to vintage toys. Nope, no kids. Nope, none on the way. Just love the toys. Thanks for asking.

I'm a sucker for quilts no matter how many I have - but I didn't buy this one.
Herrrre, piggy, piggy!!

How fun would these be in a lake or beach house? Or, in any old house ... I think your house should feel like a haven - where you're surrounded by things and people that make you smile and feel snuggly inside.

Chicken crate, anyone? Would be fun hangin on a wall, filled with purdy stuff. My meemaw used to have one of these hangin on her wall, too. Her house looks like a museum. I should do a blog post about that one day ...

I was so drawn to this. It's a 1951 highway map of NC (no highway 40!) ... I thought the hubs might like it too (as much as he could like any of my "junk" that I bring home). I couldn't resist it.

I pretended to be taking a pic of the chandeliers, but really I just wanted to capture a glimpse of the magical shug pie vendors at the Raleigh Flea Market.

Super cool for a kid's room or for a collector.

I also might've accidentally purchased this awesome old spinning top and this 1949 Playskool Parking Garage. Whoops. Don't tell Anj.

Also bought this precious vintage apron. Had a couple stains, but I plan to cut it up and use it for fabric for other creations.

 These next few are pics from the inside of the flea market ... I don't really love the inside, it's mostly new stuff, but I do ADORE this booth.

~~~~

My Sunday started off magically, because my sweet Mama made me (and everyone else, I guess ;) ) some of these:

Then, off I went to Hope Community Church - the most magical, non-stuffy, everybody's welcome, preacher ain't fake church on earth. If you live in Wake Co. and you're lookin for a church. Get on this Hope train!

How fabulous is a church that plays Nickelback songs (If Today Was Your Last Day) and performs on a stage look like somethin from Austin City Limits?

What a fab stage prop! "Unpacking Hope"

And, I get to wear my red boots and it is TOTALLY OKAY!

Check out the Welcome Message from Pastor Mike :)


After my I-feel-awesome-I'm-so-glad-I-went-to-church experience, I hit up this deliciousness from Wendy's:

1/2 lb. cheeseburger and fries not healthy, you say? Well, at least the beef is comin wit da freshness. ;)

and no, I didn't "cheat" on my no-gluten diet! I took the buns off!

Umm, Yummy!

Oh, I almost forgot, my girl Lauren from TX sent me this pic in a text this mornin ... from her September issue of Southern Living ...

Tried to find a better pic online, but failed. Anyhoo, clearly girlfriend on the left knows that red boots - precisely like my TX purchase/aka my church-goin shoes -  are where it's at. Please believe I WILL be sportin my new loves to the NC Stizzle games!

Now ... I HAVE to clean up the tornado that came through here.

Until next time,

B