store findings featuring the work of mini anj

In my on-going project of finding the surface of the shelves/floors/walls at the store, I uncovered this gem:

 

Y'all.

I am one of the most sentimental, omigosh-we-have-to-save-that! people ever.

So, you can imagine how I felt when I saw this little piece of Anj circa probably 1987-ish. 

Just look at Snookie-pie learnin' to write his name!

Not only did I save it, I framed it and put it on the mantel.

Sho did.

{I used a frameless photo frame that I got from Pier 1 forever ago, but I'm sure they have them at craft stores if you're interested in displaying a photo, collage, or document without the distraction of the frame itself.}

You just never know what you might find.

Happy Wednesday, y'all!

yummy pesto

Over the weekend, hubs & I Anj made pesto while I watched and taste-tested.

The recipe was from Southern Living.

 

All My Single Ladies: MARRY A MAN WHO CAN FEED YOU.

I'll tell y'all, the pesto turned out salty as helllll. But, 1) who sits around eatin' pesto straight up? and 2) we are thinkin' it's because we used the shakable parmesan from the green container (salty on its own) instead of fresh parmesan. 

However - once we added about 1/2 c. of walnuts (per a different recipe suggestion), and mixed it in with our {gluten free} noodles, it was perfect.

I opted to add some leftover baked chicken breast to mine.

De-lishhhhhhh!!! ohmagyahhhh.

We spent the rest of the evening enjoying our bevies and listening to the rain.

{Have you gluten-free shug pies tried New Planet? I love their Pale Ale. Hubs likes pale ales and he gave it a thumbs up. They also have a blonde ale, a raspberry ale, and a few others. I got mine at Earth Fare.}

Before bed, I wanted me a lil Diet Coke night cap. {That sounds like a problem, no?} And, I decided to add me a lil lime in there. The jury's still out on that one ...

Anj was like, "Diet Coke with lime? Isn't that a thing?"

Yep, it is. And like I said, I just haven't decided ... I think Diet Coke should stand alone {except the occasional cherry add in}.

 

Cheers to a good rest of the week! 

how to be an awesome spouse - 10 easy steps

1) when your shugpie is deep in sleep, shout out random things like, "TOO MUCH TURD TALK!" then yell, "WHAT?!" when they try to wake you from your madness

2) be sure to carry at least two, possibly three beverages on every road trip - even if it's only right down the road. make sure that they are all half open, but not gone, so that your shugpie can't justify throwing them away. fill up all the cup holders in the vehicle so that there is nowhere for your shugpie to put their phone. it's also a good idea to keep at least three half-consumed beverages open in the fridge so that they take up much-needed space.

3) drink too many adult beverages when already in a hormonal state. make sure to do it in public - either in a bar, or at someone's party. then when your spouse tries to comfort you and calm you down. flip your shit and cry like a lunatic.

4) when it's time for lunch, eat by the stove while you cook, so that your plate and your body are blocking the microwave. don't move to any other spot on the counter, because you need to be close to the pan where your tortillas are heating up - one at a time. your spouse can just heat their lunch in the microwave that you're blocking after you are done with your lunch. eating together is over-rated anyway.

5) find something on the tv that your spouse wants to watch. at first they won't even notice because usually you two don't have the same interests regarding tv time. then, when your shugpie gets good and interested, be sure to stand 2.5-3 feet in front of the tv so that your spouse can't see anything that's going on. be sure to yell loudly about every 28 seconds to emphasize that something awesome is being missed out on.

6) take tons and tons of photos of your spouse without their permission, because you think they are just the cutest widdle thing. then, post the photos on your blog.

7) when on long road trips, choose an indie rock station in which all of the songs involve extreme repetition and sounds that your spouse refers to as "racket". listen to approximately 9 or 10 of these songs in a row. flip shit when your spouse attempts to turn the station every 10 songs, because this song, like every song, is your favorite.

8) when on long road trips, plug in your ipod and choose loud, thuggish, gangsta songs, most of which your spouse never heard until meeting you. turn that shit up. LOUD. go psycho when your shugpie tries to turn the volume down.

9) at bedtime, before you crawl under the covers, and you notice that your spouse is visibly sweating - either because you can see it, or because they grab your hand and force you to touch the sweat, refuse to turn the air down. when your shugpie takes off downstairs to turn it down anyway, follow them, so you can monitor the situation.

10) when your shugpie plans a fun evening out for the two of you, per your request, stand in the closet, staring at all your clothes and whine about how you have nothing to wear because you are so fat and you feel ugly and you don't feel like fixing your hair or makeup. then fight tears because you feel fat and ugly. dream about being skinny and smokin hot. immediately after, down a hotdog, fries, and several beers.

 

11) laugh. at yourself. at your spouse. at what life hands you. squeeze your shugpie. tell em you love em, and that no matter what cards y'all are dealt, you wouldn't want to go through it with anybody else. praise God. never forget that your shugpie is a blessing that He picked out just for you, shug!

weekend

we celebrated our anniversary this weekend.

if you know us, you know i hate to dress up, and i think fancy dinners are stuffy and dull.

to those of you who love that kinda thing, party on.

1 - flowers!

2 - @ home on thurs, our actual anniv//ps: whiskey helps pms back pain.

3 - cheerwine from penguin drive-in

4 - hubs & wife bevies

5 - got sick of the gf joint, so we went somewhere else where i fell off the gf wagon. #ilovebluemoon

6 - at the bar/family name

7 - such a sweet card

8 - plain tart with strawberries, pineapples, almonds & walnuts

9 - a gluten free pancake!

our weekend was hotdogs, burgers with bacon, onion ring & pimento cheese, cheerwine, diet coke, red bridge, guinness, the annoying sound of kids throwing a basketball at a sports bar, blue moon, menstrual emotional flare ups, coffee, huevos rancheros, a long nap, a sunday drive, 

knowing with 10000% certainty that i married a damn good one.

ps - charlotte peeps, have y'all seen the new "back in only" parking spaces around central avenue?

maybe i been livin under a rock, but my mind is blown.

brilliant.

four years on 4/4

dear andrew shugpie davis,

i just wanted to let you know that you mean the world to me.

every single day, i look at you and wonder how on earth i am so blessed to be your wife.

you take care of me.

you stand up for me.

you put me first.

you deal with my to-go cup and traveling beverage needs.

you don't break my phone or camera when i take pics of you for this here bloggy.

you think i'm hot with all my pump and sensor gadgets and gizmos and surgery scars.

you hug me when i cry.

you never stop having hope and being positive, even when i don't.

in a world where vows are just part of a ceremony, and marriage is something you can get out of, or do three or four times, i'm so thankful to God for giving me someone who takes this thing we've found as seriously as i do.

i have no doubt that we've been given something that many people spend a lifetime looking for.

you are my #1 {after Jesus, of course ;) }

i love you very much.

anyone who knows me knows that i am the most indecisive person on this earth when it comes to life decisions ... but marrying you was one thing i've never had an ounce of hesitation about.

i love you anj!!!

hubs turned thirty!

yesterday was my sugarpie's thirtieth birthday.

 

{thanks aunt libby, for the photo!}

for his birthday, he is taking a ski trip with some friends of his in a few weeks.
i surprised him with these magical personalized beer labels, with some help from our friend emma.
{thanks emma!}

 

(i don't remember the site i used to design them, but you can google 'personalized beer labels')

we had a yummy meal at his parents' house,
complete with this magical chocolate cake.

check out those magical candle flames!

have a happy wednesday, shugpies!

wanna see somethin gross?

check it: 

that'd be my CGM or sensor. i do a pretty good job of checking my blood sugars frequently throughout the day to "catch" it before it's too low or too high. however, sometimes it be doin' crazy shit in my sleep. i woke up this morning and it was 271. no bueno. as a result, i felt nauseous and just icky. the sensor annoys me because it is very finicky, and has to be calibrated when your sugar is mostly stable or it won't work properly. this is funny because the whole point of wearing the sensor is that your shit is not stable. 

it also gets slingshotted into your flesh with a POP! and a long ass needle. and if you're me, it bleeds through the little hole {over there on the right}. every. single. time.

good stuff.

but - it helps me get my shit under control, so i will take it.

i made this jazz for hubs yesterday.

thanks pinterest, and boeger.

hubs made us an awesome salmon veggie bake with rice.

then we hit up mickey deez for a hot fudge sundae with nuts.

i've never really been a girl who likes dressing up and going out and spending our money on fancy food on vday. but, i do love a heartfelt surprise and to know how much i mean to hubs. he is so good to me each and every day.

hope y'all's vday was magical and whatever you wanted it to be. 

i leave you with this awesomeness for your friday.

thanks kim and facebook for sharing.

happy friday, lumps

{psa - from now on, if i say 'lumps', it's just my lazy version of 'sugarlumps' ... lazy is the name of my game}

ps - the buttons from button swaps are coming down over the weekend.

again, no hard feelings, but i'm just not up for the "marketing" side of blogging.

again, say it with me, LAY-zee.

that time i begged hubs to guest post

 Welp, after tons of straight up naggin', Anj Davis agreed to guest post answer some questions in email format. Get it while you can. My two cents are in purple.

What was going through your mind the first time you met Beth?

Not much.  It was a summer evening and I was just trying to hang out and drink some beer.  I remember how loud she was and I thought her personality was really abrasive and in-your-face.

Abrasive?
In-your-face?
That is just silly.

You can read here for my side of the whole 'how we met'.

What would have been a deal breaker right off the bat as far as any interest in a relationship with Beth?

It would have been a deal breaker if she was a yankee.  And I really liked her accent. {<---- vlog, y'all.}

Profound.

If you are a yankee reader, sorry for any offense.

Tell us how the proposal went down.

There wasn't much of a plan.  I had been holding onto the ring for about a month.  Finally I got hotel room in Raleigh and we went out to dinner.  I was thinking we would go out later and I could maybe pop the question on the street somewhere.  But we didn't make it out after dinner.  I'll let Beth tell you why (Hint: it had to do with too many 'bevvies').  I ended up asking her the next morning before we went to breakfast.

It is blowin' my mind how short his response is. 
It was my first year teaching, and he showed up at my school on a Friday afternoon. Anj never gets hot, so I thought it odd that he was bright red and sweating profusely, so I turned the air conditioning on full blast in my classroom. Then I thought it would be brilliant to walk him all over the school and have him meet show him off to anyone that I could find still in the building.

He announced that he had gotten us dinner reservations downtown and a hotel to celebrate our anniversary. So, we go by my house for me to pack my bag. I come down the steps in a dress, you know, just in case we go somewhere nice and I get proposed to. Anj's reply as I'm coming down the steps? "Why are you so dressed up?" Great. Mofo is never going to propose. {These were my own thoughts and my mama's - except hers may not have involved the "mofo" part.} 

Naturally, we start off the evening with a case of Miller Lite in the hotel room. We get to dinner and have more drinks, and after that I was inebriated and feeling irritable because I thought for sure his ass was going to propose and he clearly had no intention of doing so. He kept dilly dallying around, asking if I wanted to go to Mitch's, a bar that we frequented in college, and I was all like, "Ugh. Whatever you want to do, Anj." Soooo, we went back to the hotel where Anj was about to die to turn on the summer olympics. I just passed out in my pissed-off-ness.

The next morning, we decided to get ready and go to breakfast at The Farmer's Market. I showered first, and was standing there peering over into my bag {which was beside Anj's bag}, trying to decide what I wanted to wear. Anj is out of the shower now, acting all cracked out and jittery, wanting to know what I'm "staring" at. I explain that I am merely looking at the clothes in my bag, thinking about what I'm going to wear. Nervous that I am going to stare a hole through his bag and into the ring box, he takes the ring box out.

I stare at him in disbelief, shouting things like, "Shut up! What is that?!" while I back away from him like he's holding a snake.

He is 88 shades of pink at this point, and I am just shocked still.

So, I was pissed that he didn't propose, and then still surprised.

Win. Win.

We get home to my parents'. My mama initially expected the proposal, but after no phone call the night before, she assumed that no such proposal had happened.

I went upstairs and showed her the ring, and she cried like mamas do.
Shortly thereafter phone calls and celebratory festivities ensued.

What are Beth's quirks/habits? Which do you love/which do you hate?

Like:  her cutesy, baby-talk voice, random dance moves, love of old stuff
Hate: smoking when drinking, biting her nails, 'duck face', has to have some kind of liquid refreshment AT ALL TIMES NO EXCEPTIONS. PULL OVER NOW! WAIT! WE CAN'T LEAVE YET! I NEED TO FIX MY CUP WITH MY SPECIAL ICE OUT OF THE ICE TRAYS BECAUSE YOUR ICE FROM THE ICE MAKER STINKS!    {The crossed out part is what he actually said, when I was like, "Whaaaat?!" but it is not in fact what he typed. Therefore, I crossed it out because I was accused of being "disingenuous".}

It's surprising to me that he likes my love of old stuff. I always feel like he thinks I'm just bringin' home more shit to junk up our house. He further clarified that he does not want more shit in our apartment. However, he appreciates that I'm not picky and turnin' my nose up at things that aren't brand new.

I too, hate that I smoke when I drink.

Didn't really realize the nail biting was a thing. I've done it since I was a kid. I have gotten better though, unless I am stressed or pissed.

Me and my beverages? Lemme tell you this, Anj Davis. If my 'beverages' are as high maintenance as I get, you better count your blessins.

And the 'duck face'. Ugh. I wish I could stop.

Tell us how you expect Beth would answer this same question about you:

Hate:  whistling to songs, cold hands/feet, watching sports
Like:   making delicious treats

 I don't hate the watching of sports.

I hate that he watches ALL sports, college level and professional, all year long. I'm serious.

Football, basketball, baseball, tennis, soccer, summer and winter olympics, Nascar, hockey.

If they keepin' score, Anj Davis is watchin' 
{and dancin when his team's doin' well and screamin' expletives if they are losin'}.

He is wrong about the whistling, though. I loooooove it.

The heated mattress pad has helped some with the burying of Anj's cold toes under Beth's warm leg. 
I do, however, hate that we have entire conversations that he doesn't remember. I know he is listening because he is responding to what I am saying. Then, when said event or obligatory function or whatever comes up, he's all like, "What?! You didn't tell me about this." Bullshit, I know I did!

And, I looooove that my Anjpie cooks delicious treats for us all. the. time.
 I am also a huge fan of watching Anj dance in front of the TV during commercial breaks or when his team is doing well.
I love that he puts up with my pickiness with soft drinks.
I love how Anj can rock a sweater vest, and then turn right around and look hot in his Carhartt workpants and boots.

I also get tons of enjoyment watching all the random things that go on in Anj's sleep: the conversations, the eye brow raises, the hand motions, the way he scratches his chest gently for like 5 minutes. The way he sits up, puts his glasses on, lays back down on the pillow. All while sleeping.

What were the hardest adjustments during the first year of marriage??  

Learning to be selfless and empathetic

Tis true, friends.

Marriage is not about you, your friends, your family, your schedule, your job.
Everybody's mama 'nem will have to get over it. It's time to leave the nest.
Your spouse comes before the family you grew up in.
This doesn't mean you have to abandon your family and isolate yourself once you get married, but do what's best for your marriage first, then worry about everybody else. 
If they don't like it, two tears in a bucket, friends. 
They won't be the ones livin' in your unhappy marriage.
Your marriage is your business, not what everybody else thinks.

It's a whole new concept of being half of something, it's not just you anymore.

The sooner you see your spouse as your first-of-kin/best friend/#1 priority, the better off you will be.

What advice/tips do you have for other serious relationships out there that are forced to deal with traveling and/or long distance??

Text/chat throughout the day.  Ignore small disagreements.

Word.

Just make sure your shugpie knows that they are on your mind.

What are Beth's domestic strengths?

Laundry, cleaning when she gets the urge, decorating

He's a good man, y'all because I hate doing laundry, and I feel like I can never stay on top of it.

And it's just the two of us!

I do love me some decor, now!

What do you think Beth would say are your domestic strengths?

Cooking, keeping things neat, grocery shopping

Anj is the shiz with cooking/grocery shopping.

I also really appreciate how organized and proactive he is with our finances.

Neat? ... Hmm, I'm thinking "OCD about certain things" might be a more accurate description.

{I mean that in the most loving way possible, because I am NOT neat about many things anything.}

Name the 5 things that Beth could not give up for a year if her life depended on it.

1. Soft drinks (DMD, CFD Coke, Cherry Coke Zero, etc...this could be the entire answer)
2. Facebook
3. Rap music
4. Blog world
5. Camera

yep, yep, yep, yep & yep
These would be his:
1) peanuts/peanut butter
2) internet {The Wolf Web/Reason/various "Today I was reading this article" sources}
3) Satellite radio with damn Jake Fogelnest & Josiah
4) ESPN, especially "Pardon the Interruption"
5) booze, namely Elijah Craig with Cherry Lime Sundrop and various IPA's

What's one piece of marriage advice you'd give to guys out there?

She comes first in all situations.  All others come second.

This made me tear up when I read it.

Guys {if y'all are readin'}, this is the key to a happy marriage!

This doesn't mean let your wife boss your ass, but her feelings/needs come before everyone else's.

{She should be doing the same for you.}

What's one piece of marriage advice you'd give to girls?

You married a person, not a project.  You will be constantly disappointed if you think you can change that person.

I agree.

Bitches be gettin' on my nerves with this tryin' to change somebody thing.

Get over it, princess! He's dealing with your flaws too!

Where do you see the Davis family in 20 years??

Celebrating NC State's incredible 20 straight national titles in both sports

Naturally.

I've always loved Anj's optimism.

_________________________________________

Marriage isn't for poohs, friends.

I would suggest praying all the way through.

And being thankful every single day for your shugpie.

greetings, 2013

my first thought was, 'nothing super eventful happened in 2012. i mean, nothing worth blogging about anyway.'

but, that's a lie.

every day, every month, every year, is a learning experience, and some things realized, some things lost, some things gained.

in 2012, 

i let go and let God ... move me to somewhere i had major hesitations about at first.

after a bunch of back and forth about jobs and work and what to do,

i just said, 'screw it.'

i'm happy now.

i gave up a job that i thought i'd wanted forever.

i took another job similar to it in a new city.

that job was taken away before my first day of teaching.

a month later i found out i was pregnant.

i felt extreme joy.

and extreme uneasiness and fear.

four weeks after finding out i was pregnant, 

i found out it was ectopic.

i had surgery hours later.

i cried a lot.

i thanked God for getting me through it,

and for giving me a positive prognosis for the future.
 {are y'all sick of reading about the ectopic?
because i'm sick of thinking about it/writing about it,
but it's still a thing in my world right now, so thanks for stickin' around.}

i finally got my a1c below 6.

5.8 !!!!

i thanked God some more.

i learned that there is no such thing as a normal family.

everybody's has got somethin'.

love 'em anyway.

i learned it's okay to do what feels best for your own marriage/family.

even if that means your family and friends don't always get it.

 choose space,

and time with your husband,

if that's what you and your husband want and need.

life's too short to stay busy with stuff that makes you irritated and unhappy.

i saw my husband in a whole new light.

turns out it is possible to wake up everyday and love him more than i did the day before that, 

or the day before that, 

or the day before that.

sometimes yucky times are also times for you to feel someone's love in a different way than you ever have before,
because they have an opportunity to show you that love in a different way than they ever have before.

i feel like i know who i am again.

i haven't felt like this since high school.

maybe this sounds strange to some people.

i learned that caring what people think doesn't change it,

so why waste your energy?

i learned that no matter what you do,

somebody will be judging.

or be pissed.

or irritated.

again, i learned that caring what people think doesn't change it,

so why waste your energy?

i have a lot more free time than i used to.

and although i'm not as busy with stuff stress,

i can think about what's around me.

i can appreciate it.

i can learn to be who i am and say no sometimes.

what i do or don't do for a living is not who i am.

my diabetes is not who i am.

having a baby is not who i am.

thanks to God for seeing things ahead of time.

for setting it up perfectly.

for letting me know i'll be okay.

for giving me the most amazing husband.

a husband i could have never dreamed up.

he's all the things i needed and wanted,

even before i knew it.

here's to 2013,

the next 365 days,

the good,

the bad,

the scary,

the sad,

the frustrating.

may we be blessed enough to grow from it,

and be a little bit more of what God intends us to be.

______________

and the resolutions, well, i just want to get back on the wagon that i fell off of recently:

i need to get back to some form of exercise - loved my daily walks and i let the weather talk me out of it, then holidays came, and now i am totally derailed.

and gluten, been cheatin' like a mo on that.
no bueno.

other than that, i'ma keep livin' how i'm livin'.

new year's eve bonfire tonight, y'all!
whoop! whoop!
remember last year's bonfire/oyster roast?

this year's pics will be sans Nita Nikon, but we will survive.

happy new year's eve, friends!
be safe!

some thoughts on age

we celebrate quite a few birthdays in our families between october and november.
there's also been loss, and some sad news recently.
and at the same time, there have been several births and several reasons to celebrate.

it got me to thinking about life, and age and what it really means.

anj and i are both 29, and several of our friends have already turned 30 or will very soon. people are like, "OMG. The big three-oh."
but why? it's another day. a day to be celebrated. not a time to bitch and whine about everything you don't have and you haven't done.

maybe your childhood sucked and your adulthood is everything you dreamed it would be.
maybe you went through some serious shit, and you hit your rock bottom.
maybe now, as an adult, you are doing what you love everyday and getting paid for it.
maybe you're not. but maybe you have a wonderful family, or wonderful friends, or better yet, some of each to share this life with.
maybe you have perfect health and appreciate it. maybe you have perfect health and take it for granted because you are too busy concentrating on something else.
maybe you have shitty health, but can still say that you are genuinely happy over all.
things are all about perspective, aren't they? 
 i think that a positive outlook is something that you have to want, and seek out. it doesn't just happen. sometimes a positive outlook involves getting negative people and dead ends out of your life, even if it hurts at first. for me, a positive outlook took a lot of prayer. and i try very hard to see the positive in every situation. if you make yourself do it for awhile, it starts to come naturally.

some people say all they want is for their kids to be happy.
well, i don't.
i think that's selling them short.
you cannot give your kids happy. and the more you try to mold the situation to make them happy, or buy it for them, the more you are preventing them from learning and growing.
life is about obstacles. things beyond our control.
sometimes our feelings are hurt, or we are given the raw end of the deal.
but, it teaches us to be grateful and have compassion.

and we become obsessed with physical appearance, more so as we age.
i weigh more than i used to. but, i don't hate my body. i'm grateful for the body God gave me. the only people who look cute skinny as hell and shaped like a tampon are 15 year old girls.
to me, my husband gets better looking with age.
my mom looks better now than she did when she was young and skinny as a rail.
i think what's attractive is your attitude, and taking care of your body, even if you aren't a size 6.

i had a friend once who was devastated to turn 25. she was also the friend who ran all. the. damn. time. not attractive. i wanted to smack the shit out of her.

i personally, am loving 29. i love being married. i'm truly happy now. i'd love to have a child, but I also know that my marriage is a blessing that not everyone has.

i know women with great grandkids who can admit they've never known what it was like to be truly head over heels in love. to be best friends with your husband. to have fun every single day. to make each other laugh. there are also women who are grandmothers who will not get out of their house to have some fun with their girlfriends because they are a slave to routine. they are terrified the house will fall apart with them gone away for a weekend. or maybe they are terrified it won't fall apart without them there to run everything?

i love home. i love making meals together. making things to take to reunions, and get togethers. i like that we are in the age of going to shows and being home by 12 instead of getting started at 12. while i enjoyed high school and college, i have no desire to go back. maybe for a day, but i'm sure i'd be ready to get back to where i am now.

i like decorating our home. folding our laundry. the sound of the dishwasher running. the best part of my day is snuggle time with anj in our white t-shirts, while we each read our respective books in bed or on the couch, with a fire going if it's cold enough. my favorite shoes are my ll bean mocassins. i don't buy things with a high heel because they make my back hurt. i also do not buy things that have to be ironed. life is too short to spend time doing something you hate so you can look cute. to all you ladies without back pain and who love to iron, march on, shugpies!

some people die when they are 15. some take their own lives because they are miserable. some die having the time of their lives. other people finally learn to live when they are 45. they learn that you can't please everybody, but you can be kind and do what's good for your health and your soul.

what do you think? what does age mean to you?

Life.

Do you know the first day of your last menstrual period?

You get used to answering this a million times.

When your voice is shaking on the phone to make your first appointment - set for around 7 weeks.

When you call back around week 5 because you had some pain and some spotting.

When you call the weekend on-call number around 7 weeks because you had more pain and more spotting, this time, heavier, with tissue.

Hanging up the phone, and feeling joy because "it doesn't sound like anything to panic about in the first trimester". Then, 30 minutes later, bawling - for the 100th time in the longest 5 weeks of your life because you know that something just is not right.

Finally, appointment day. This day had been prayed over a million and one times. Please, God. Take care of my baby. Take care of me. Take care of my husband. Take care of us. Let us be able to handle whatever it is. I know your plans are best, even when I don't understand them. But, of course, I am secretly longing for God's plans to be my plans. The baby is just fine, I am just fine, everything is just fine.

Hours of googling, sending husband to pharmacy at random hours. It's probably constipation pains. Maybe it's something I ate. Is this safe to take? I've never been in this much pain in my life.

But wait. I do feel better now. Maybe I am okay after all. Yeah, it was probably nothing.

Exhaustion.

By the time the appointment rolled around. I was ready - or as ready as I would ever be. Ready for God to take this child from me if that's what needed to happen. I felt trapped in my own body. Trapped in my own mind. Helpless. I cannot make the bleeding stop. I don't know why I'm hurting. But my levels are going up. I'm so confused.

But that's the thing. When you feel like that, you know. You've done all you can. It was in the Good Lord's hands from the beginning. Period.

So, when the sonogram via my belly revealed that my uterus was empty. We tried to take a look vaginally. Nope. Nothing in there - just a shooting pain to my left ovary.

Again.

"Honey, I have a bad suspicion that this is ectopic."

I just sat there, staring at the screen. Andrew was holding my hand. I felt devastated. And relieved at the same time. I just wanted to escape it. I wanted to just do what I needed to do to fix it, and start over. Later.

Anj is ever the optimist. One of the zillions of reasons why I married him. "We'll get 'em next time."

"I know. We will." I said it, and was trying really hard to fully believe it.

We left the sonogram room and went to the exam room to wait for the doctor. "First of all, let me say that I am so sorry that this is happening." The rest was a blur of a conversation about how this was not my fault. It wasn't my diabetes. (Which has been nearly perfect the whole pregnancy. How ironic that I thought that would be the concern!) It wasn't my thyroid, which is borderline hypo, and the reason I got on low dose thyroid hormone the day after I had a postive test. It was nothing I did or didn't do.

I knew this, and I believed the doctor. This was my one comfort. God is the only one who knows the whys. He is ultimately in control of every single thing on this planet. If I didn't believe this, I would have given up hope on many, many things a long, long time ago.


Am I mad at God?

Absolutely not.

Do I wish I could text Him and ask Him if everything is going to work out in the long run?

Totally.

But, that's where faith and trust come in.

The doctor explained that surgery would be needed in the next few hours. My stomach felt sick because we hadn't told anyone. Not even our mothers. I wanted to be the ever cautious, meticulous control freak that I am, and make sure everything was super and A-okay before doing a big, happy, cutesy reveal at precisely 13 wks.

Welp, what ended up happening was my husband calling my mother to tell her that we went to the gyno with a positive pregnancy test, found out it was ectopic, and I would be in surgery in the next few hours.

*screech*

At this point, I have let out one good cry, over the loss of the thought of my child. For me, the baby didn't feel like "our child" yet. I'm sure this is different for every woman. I was terrified to fall in love with this child because I had horrifying fears through the majority of the pregnancy that something was wrong. Every woman is entitled to her emotions, of which she has no real control over anyway. If I did, I would think logically, relying on the positive words and encouragement of my doctor alone, and calculate exactly how much time should go by before medical data suggests we should try again.

Guess what. Those are nice guidelines. But, God is in control of this. I know that He will give us a child if and exactly when He sees fit. And this is fine with me.


Do I wallow and cry? Yes. Right after feeling all encouraged and grateful that I didn't have a ruptured tube and bleed to death.

The thing no one tells you about pregnancy is that from the very moment you know, and for me, I knew before the test told me so, you feel different. For me, I felt like a mother right away. I felt like God had given me something to take care of, and I was willing to feel or endure whatever I had to in order to take care of this child. But, God decided this wasn't the one. This wasn't the time.

We waited in the exam room with a box of Kleenex while my ovary throbbed and the nurse called the hospital over and over trying to get me admitted. Then, the doctor called them back and asked for a manager to get me pushed through quickly because I was diabetic and I would not be able to eat or drink before or several hours after. Not to mention that we didn't know if the tube had ruptured or not at this point.

My sweet husband just sat there, holding my hand. Asking me what I needed from home, reassuring me that he would be right back to the hospital as fast as he could. Telling me that he would call my mom for me. I felt like I should tell her myself, but I just couldn't get through it without an inaudible meltdown. Thank God for him.

This is what makes husbands blessings. They just pick up where your mind and energy has abandoned you. They just do it for you. When you can't think and you don't know.

Off we went.

Admittance.

Trying, with no success at first (thank you dehydrated veins) to find a good vein for the IV. Blood draws. Weight. Blood sugar. Blood Pressure. times 5. Here's your gown. Here's some antacid and anti-nausea. I started to feel like hell. And panicked because I was just there. In the room. Without Anj. I knew he would be right back - he wanted to go now, and be at the hospital when they took me back in case something happened. I was watching Carrie Underwood's story on VH1 or something and praying to God that they would just hurry up and come get me. I wanted to be done.

 Ready to go?

Anj arrived back with our things in time to walk me down and kiss me good luck. The nurse anesthetist made jokes, gave me the good stuff. We turned the corner, the lights looked bright, and in what seemed like 30 minutes later, I was out of surgery.

Except really, it was 4 hours. The surgery itself did not take 4 hours. This includes recovery/observation. PS - they wanted to give me 15 units of insulin to correct a blood sugar of 289 as I was waking up. My first slurred, half conscious words were, "No. That's way too much. I'll go into a coma. Can I please have my pump back?" Thank sweet Jesus the nurses agreed that whoever suggested that was nuts and just let me in my half drugged state hook my pump back up and deal with it myself.

I was being wheeled down the hallway, trying as hard as I could to keep my eyes open. There was my mama. (Damn, she must've done 120 all the way here! What's that? Four hours have gone by? Oh.) There was my sweet Anj.

The next part was a blur. I remember putting my pump back on. In my muffin top, toward my back side. My stomach looked like a beach ball and it was tight and bright orange. What the hell had happened? I had no idea and didn't really care.

I woke up a couple times in the night to check my blood and make sure it was going down. It was. Good. They kept coming in to take my vitals. They were good. Check. Blood count was good. Check. They wanted me to try to pee, so, at 2am, I felt the urge to call the nurse to come help me pee. My bladder didn't feel full. I don't know why I was trying to pee. Anyway, this little blonde came in. She looked scared to death to be a nurse - like I would have looked if I had gone through with nursing. (Yikes.) She sat me up, helped me to dangle my feet off the edge of the bed, stood me up, and started to walk me to the bathroom.

When I woke up, I was laying sideways on the bed, and now there were three nurses, lifting me back into my original position in the bed. "We'll try that again around 5am, mmk, honey?"

They left, the room was dark. All was quiet. Anj was snuggled in his stiff ass, uncomfortable and super squeaky recliner, and he chuckled to himself and said, "Pass the fuck out. hahaha"

I started to laugh and I could have smacked him it hurt my guts so bad to laugh. But, the laughter was good. Asshole. :) Love you!

A few vital checks, nausea waves and lucid whack ass dreams later, the older nurse who knew what the hell she was doing comes in and sits me up in bed. "This time, we gone let you sit up a bit and give your blood pressure some time to adjust before we take a walk across the room. :) " Yeah. That sounds smart, I decided. An hour and a half later, we turned me sideways and let my legs dangle off the bed for a minute or so. Then, two nurses stood me up.

Every. single. step. was. a. work. out. You okay? Don't close your eyes! Don't look down! Take deep breaths! Nope! Don't look down! Don't close your eyes! Open your eyes! Look up here! You okay?

Finally - we make it to the toilet.

How in the Lord's name am I going to look down long enough to lower myself onto that toilet? This is an impossible task, I thought.

I made it, with lots of black clouds floating around.

You okay? Don't close your eyes! Don't look down! Take deep breaths! Nope! Don't look down! Don't close your eyes! Open your eyes! Look up here! You okay?

Nope. (I seriously kept tellin her I was not, in fact, okay.) Next thing I know, I'm sniffin ammonia while two nurses and Anj Davis hold me up. BETH! BETH! BETH!

"What?!" I snapped. Damn, I'm right here, no need to yell!

I really did try to keep my eyes open, y'all, I swear!

Sooooo, after some chicken broth, sugar free jello, shit tons of Diet Coke, Diet Ginger Ale, eggs, sausage, strawberries and grapes, I started to feel a little more stable, and slowly was able to pee on my own, with an assistant. :) Yay!

This also meant the anesthesia was wearing off and I was ready for some pills.

It is mind blowing what that man did with three tiny incisions. Absolutley amazing. The tube had not ruptured, but they did have to take part of the left one. Both ovaries are in tact, and "the future looks very bright for you".

I can say this: The Lord is good. I could have died. I love every single doctor, nurse, nurse anesthetist, anesthesiologist, nutritionist, and custodian I came in contact with through this whole ordeal. WHAT A BLESSING. I am seriously going to send them a card. Especially the surgeon, my regular gyno, his nurse, and Melissa, my nurse at the hospital. (Is this an awards speech or what? :) )

I basically went home very very thankful and feeling very very blessed to be alive and to have been under the care of people who clearly knew what they were doing. I never once feared the surgery itself.

The next morning, a wave of depression hit. When I allowed myself to think the worst. What if it's ectopic again next time?

What if there's something wrong with the other tube? (Even though the doctor said it's healthy.)

What if I just can't conceive again, period?

What if?

What if?

What if?

Then I tell myself, the Lord is bigger than all that, and your faith should be too. Everyone's story has a different ending, and God has His reasons for all those endings.

But, for now, I am trying very, very hard to think positive. The doctors have given me no reason not to. My God has shown me miracles more than once in this life of mine, my friends. Yes, He has.

Next time, because I do believe there will be a next time, I will share my news earlier. I will allow Andrew and I to be more supported by those who love us. Pain is part of life. I want them to share in our experiences, even when they aren't happy ones. When you have your first tiny glimpse into motherhood, you have a new connection and a new respect for your own mother, your grandmother, your aunts, your mother in law, all mothers. These little glimpses of love in yucky times are gifts from God as well. I feel so much closer to my mother since just day before yesterday when this all started. What a gift. And, you've still gotta find the humor. Even if it involves a bloody panty liner, a gas station, and a dirty old man. Forgive me. Maybe he wasn't dirty. But, the thought that he might've been made us laugh, which was much needed.  I'm sure you've already heard enough about the bloody panty liner, so I will give you a prize by not telling the story in detail.

I also wanted to write this post to hopefully make at least one person feel better by knowing that you aren't the only one. And to tell y'all that without my God, I would NOT be able to deal.

To those who have texted, called, emailed, sent messages,

THANK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY SOUL FOR YOUR PRAYERS. I know I personally, never know what to say in situations like these. The thing I need right now, is your prayers, for healing and for positive thinking, and that Andrew and I never forget that the good Lord above HAS A PLAN.

And it is a perfect one.

I have seen in a few short days how much we are loved.

WHAT A BLESSING.

I had a wonderful conversation with my brother. That meant the world to me. My mother came to see us as soon as she knew. Others respected our wishes by being with us in prayer, and sent positive texts, messages, cards, etc.

I can say that never once in my life has the good Lord EVER given me something painful to deal with and not given me an abundance of love and support in the form of friends and family. He has NEVER ONCE abandoned me.

I feel that He is closer to me now than ever. If this painful situation brings me closer to Him, and strengthens my relationship with my husband, and our relationship with those we love, then that is a blessing. I also feel that our marriage is even more solid than it was last month. I know my husband is there for me. He is my #1 and I am his. I have always prayed for God to give us a solid foundation, and He is, my friends. My husband is my soul.

So, in closing, we have been through a roller coaster of emotions, from the highest highs when we found out we were expecting, to the depths of despair and anxiety in the unknown, to the devastation of losing this baby, the profound gratitude that my own life was spared and I didn't have more damage than I did.

Our God is a powerful God. He is bigger than ANY circumstance. He ALWAYS knows what He's doing, and only works for the good of those who love Him. We have to remember that our "good" and His may not always look the same, but the difference is, only He knows what lies around the corner. Only He knows what alternative outcome we are being protected from. If you are in despair, whether you are struggling with fertility issues or something different altogether, take it to the Lord in prayer.

Alan Jackson's Precious Memories CD has been invaluable to me during this time. God made us. He knows what we need when we quite frankly, have no idea. I am working very hard and praying very hard for Him to give me the grace to trust Him more and more everyday.

I will never be the same after this experience, but if we don't grow and change, then what is the point of living?

Thank you all again! We cannot thank you enough for your continued prayers. I go to the doctor next week for a post-op follow up visit.

God has a plan.

xo

(Too tired to edit this, so if things don't make sense, let's blame tiredness and pain killers, k? Word.)

*please check out the ectopic pregnancy label for more recent posts on this topic

a late night thought on marriage.

it's 11:23 at night, and grandma that i am, i am normally in bed and fast asleep by now. but, tonight, i couldn't sleep. ever have those nights when you can't turn your brain off? usually mine is from worrying (workin on that) ... but, tonight, i was just thinkin. about life. how it changes from childhood to when you're a teenager. to when you go to college and/or leave home/town and are on your own for the first time. and how the people closest to you changes too.

when you are a child, your family is your everything. they teach and model for you what is normal. what love is. what is and isn't okay. then, you get older, and your friends become your world. you just know that y'all will be inseparable forever.

but then, college is over, or you get your dream job, or you meet the man of your dreams. life gets busier. you make time for phone dates or trips to starbucks or target. and if you are lucky, you marry a wonderful man who loves and embraces your friends like you do.

on nights like this when i'm thinking too much, i lay there and watch anj sleep, and think how very very precious he is to me. how i simply cannot believe that God had it in His plans to pick this man out just for me. if it's pms time, it really makes me want to cry.

anj is so good - too good - to me. he takes care of me, emotionally and physically. those of you who really know me know that i am a worrier, and i am much, much more sensitive than i appear to be. i can work myself into a tizzy over nothing. i'm learning that life's too short for that mess though. but, anj, he is so perfect for me. i cannot name one single time in our whole eight years when i freaked out about something and he didn't act like it wasn't a big deal. not one single time.

even the time when i literally cut the end of my thumb off, all the meat past the fingernail - bled hard and fast for 3 hours ... blood runnin down to my elbows - did anj freak out? no ma'am. he just brought me a plate of food (that i couldn't eat because one hand was bleeding and the other one was holding pressure on it) and drove off to cvs to buy all kindsa shit to make a bandage. cool as a cucumber, friends. i - on the other hand, was cryin like a baby and rockin back and forth like i had absolutely no sense whatsoever.

it used to make me mad that he was so calm all the time. but now, i see what a blessing it is. the last thing i need is somebody to egg me on. there was a time in my life when i dated such a guy. he was high strung like me, and easy to get all rowled up. not a good combination.

we are friends with couples now who are just like that. one is cool as a cucumber, and the other not so much. as long as you are with your balance, all is good in the hood. a lot of my friends and family and people that i've known over the years have marriages that would never in eight million years be kosher with me. that is not to say that their way is wrong, just wrong for us.

anyhoo, this is what comes out when i write late at night after thinking what a magical snuggle pie anj is. sometimes it feels like, wow! how could we have really been knowing each other for eight years?!? and other times, it feels like every single day when he walks through the door, it's the first time i've ever laid eyes on him. and this is really only the beginning. i have no idea why God chose to bless me the way He did with this man, but I certainly am thankful.

now, back to sleep it is {hopefully}

deuces ;)

three years as the Missus

I can't believe it's been three years. So much has happened in these three years, but I still feel magical and bubbly when it comes to Anj Davis. I thank God everyday because I know we are blessed. But not perfect. Takes prayer, love and patience.

When we got engaged, I prayed for God to make our marriage solid. For us to put God first, then each other and our marriage. He has done just that. And some of it's been challenging. But, I do. I value and love my husband more now than I did three years ago when I married him. I love him in a different way. In a more solid and real way.

In my opinion, anyone who says marriage doesn't make things different is either lying or has their priorities out of order. We dated for four years before getting married, and I thought, how different can it be? We know each other so well, and have already been through a good bit. Wrong. It's not that the people in the marriage morph into someone else. But, you have made promises to God about what you will do and who you will be in your marriage. And it's not something to take lightly. God always knows what's on your heart. And I think He expects you to keep your promises and to give it your all.

For me, it was an adjustment to see Andrew as my first of kin. My other half. That's what I told God he would be to me, and I meant it. But, I had to learn how to do that, and exactly what that meant. It's weird to spend your whole life (especially as a girl) thinking of Mama and your family you grew up with as your world, and then when you get married, they are no longer your "first of kin". But it's something I grew into. And I don't love my mama, or any of the rest of my family any less. But my heart grew, and my husband comes first in all of my decisions. His opinion counts first. His needs are my job. And that's more than okay with me. And it's a two way street. We are each other's family and put each other first (after God) - before everyone and everything else in this life. There will always be people on the outside looking in, thinking you did the wrong thing. Even people who love you and want what's best for you and your marriage might judge. But you have to pray about it, consciously put your spouse first, and trust your instincts.

It's weird to not just make a decision - but to consult (and want to consult) your spouse first. And other people may not love that decision. But, frankly, it's not up to them.

I think that it's important to find the balance in your relationship. Not every marriage is gonna work the same way. Who does the cooking, the cleaning, the money managing, the childcare ... or whatever balance of such responsibilities you and your spouse decide. What matters is that both people feel respected and supported. It's not so much, "this is your job and this is my job", but rather, "this is how we divide things, and this is how we like it, even if other couples don't do it this way."



There are a couple things, however that I think benefit all relationships, no matter what:

1) Pray about everything and pray for your spouse daily. Sometimes, you and your spouse just aren't going to agree on something. And maybe, neither of you even knows what's best. You've analyzed it until it doesn't even make sense. Stop arguing with your spouse. Stop analyzing. Pray about it instead. And pray for them. And truly, stop and think, Am I being selfish? Or am I thinking about what's best for us and our marriage?

2) Remember, your spouse is the other half of you. That's how God sees it. And seeing it this way helps tremendously when your spouse does something that makes you angry, or that you don't understand. How you treat your spouse, is how you treat your relationship, which will directly affect you in the long run. Don't kill something that you may never find again. If it's important to your spouse, especially if it bothers them, then it should be important to you too - even if you don't understand it. Maybe your spouse gets really stressed about money. So, don't do shit to add to the problem, like making purchases that you know aren't really necessary. Talk about it. Set up a budget so that there's some grounds, and some leeway for spending, and your spouse feels like y'all are on the same team now. Or, if your spouse hates that you spend so much time away from home/hanging out with so-and-so, WHATEVER it is. Take time to discuss it. Don't let it grow bigger and bigger just because you think their fear/dislike is unfounded.

3) NEVER say things to belittle or insult your spouse, period. Even when your spouse is not around. But - ESPECIALLY in front of other people. EVER.  If you have an issue with something they did, voice your feelings, but don't take stabs at them as a person. This includes making fun of how he did a shitty job fixing the sink, or how you asked him to do something "simple", but he did "blah, blah, blah" instead. He is not a child. And you talking disrespectfully about him to other people makes you look like a bitch. Period. So don't. It's hard to clean up the mess your mouth makes.

4) Choose your battles. If he did/does something that truly hurts/disrespects you, say something. But ... if he didn't fold the towels the way you like, or if she don't make biscuits the way your mama does it. Get over it, playah. Suck it up. Guess what? You didn't marry ya mama/daddy. Overall, is it worth nagging him about? Maybe you can do it ya damn self, know what I'm sayin? Your spouse loves you. And comes home to you every night. And chose you to marry. Focus on the positives, sugar.

5) Be thankful. Let your shug pie know you appreciate and love him and that you think he's a hottie. He will appreciate it, and want to make sure you keep on feelin' that way.

OBVIOUSLY these all apply to both spouses, mmmk?

And that's Big Mama Shug's top 5 for now.  I'm not perfect. Neither is Anj. And I'm certain we both still have tons to learn. But we are blessed. And thankful. And show each other how much we are glad the other is here. :)

Yours Truly,
Mrs. Anj Davis

let's go for a walk

Today, after Anj made us some DELICIOUS omelets, Hubs Davis and I went for a walk to a nearby pond.

Dear Winter, 

It's been real. But, now I'm ready for skirts and flip flops and warm sunshine and not having to thaw my car out every morning. Also, I'm excited to see what's in store. You know I love you though. We'll see you next year, k? Now, go on. You're about to overstay your welcome.

Happy Birthday Anj!

Hello friends! Guess what?

Today is dear hubs' birfday. (Actually, it's not on the 25th, but the 26th. But, it is the 26th where he is right now. Yep. Think about that one. Weird, huh?)

Soooo ... I thought I would do something special (and embarrassing) for him here on the bloggage. Especially since he insists that all my endearing comments, photos and gestures (not to be confused with guesstures) are for the sole purpose of humiliating him, anyway.

So, here it is ...

Dearest Anjpie Davis,

Here is a list that just barely skims the BOJILLIONS of reasons why I am head. over. heels. in. love. with. you.

1) you always wear slippers - usually with socks

2) you laugh at my jokes/snarky comments

3) you have conversations with people who are unbeknownst to me ... in your sleep, complete with eyebrow raises, hand movements and laughs

4) you are a cursing, violent, scary, over-the-top, passionate sports watcher, especially when watching the Pack ... I typically only watch when State plays, but I ALWAYS love to watch you watching whoever ... and God knows YOU WILL watch EVERY team because you. need. to. know!

4a) we share a mutual hatred for carolina and everything that they think they are

5) you eat granola with honey and milk every. single. weekday. for breakfast (eggs and bacon are a part of your world on the weekends or holidays)

6) i love you in your PRADA reading glasses as you drink your tasty sometimes skunk-smelling brewed beverage

7) you wanted to keep your wisdom teeth after they had been ripped from the sockets (i kept my last one too)

8) oftentimes, you say, "how bout that?" after discovering something interesting

9) you obsessively brush and floss your teeth

10) you drink adult beverages from a proper low ball glass ... but only on Fridays, Saturdays, and holidays

11) you remind me how terrible my Diet Coke habit is ... but you will still bring me some from the store if I (nicely) ask you to

12) you love tailgating as much as I do, including getting out there at 7:30 am in 40 degree weather (which to us, is cold)

13) you build magical fires for us in the wintertime

14) to you, nothing could be greater than a small apple, straight from the fridge (not me, hurts my teeth) with peanut butter

15) you encourage and support me - always ... my blog, my love of photography, my creative ideas/daydreams, and tell me that I'm doing a great job taking care of my diabetes

16) you take great care in overseeing our finances. (because I loathe it) it feels great to be part of a team and know that you care about our future. :)  (and that app is the shiz)

17) you prefer to drink any warm beverage out of the awesome vintage NC Stizzle coffee cups (thanks Ber ... we love them dearly)

18) you smell good ... especially when wearing white t-shirts

19) you make us BOMB diggity chili

20) and beef bourguignon

21) and omelets (hey, you knew right off the bat how much I love to eat ... thanks for working two jobs in college to help support our my two meals per night habit ;) )

22) you listen to indie rock on Sirius

23) you use words in real conversation that most people use to jazz up term papers (confession: sometimes I pretend I don't know what words mean just so you will say, "What?! You don't know what ---- means?!" hehehehe)

24) you enjoy using Excel (bleck!)

25) you like taking me to the fair and rodeos and festivals (most of the time)

26) you bought me business card paper for Christmas so I could make business cards for my blog

27) you love Brody because I love Brody

28) you are optimistic 99.9999% of the time, and remind me of all we have to be thankful for when I am in a yuck mood

29) you like to try fun new restaurants (we should go eat German again soon .... yummmm)

30) we have the same sense of humor and can laugh at something simple, alone on our couch, for a good 15 minutes

31) you mute the TV when that annoying "silent treatment" AT&T commercial comes on ... or the Lowe's newlywed couple "Uh, yeah we do!" comes on  ... stab me

32) you always put peanut M&M's in my Christmas stocking

33) totes.

34) you picked out Bomb Arse yarn and knitting needles for me for Christmas (don't know if I coulda picked em that good)

35) you keep handy lists of things on small notepads

36) you are so smart, and many of our magical discussions have evolved from how you often start sentences with "Today, I was reading this article ..."

37) you laugh really, really loud when you watch Tosh.O

38) we both love 30 Rock

39) you stand up to watch TV because if you sit down, you will fall asleep (actually, I am typing this as I sit riiight beside you on the couch sleeping, ... no clue.)

40) I love our "system" ... you holler at the TV when State's playin, and I finish your inappropriate comment/explicative/angry outburst with "... Bitch!"

41) you think I am a hottie and tell me so (not exactly in these words)

42) you blow your nose with a handkerchief like only a real ballah would

43) garden fresh veggies. yumm-ay! I am starting to realize that your ability and desire to provide me with food is showing up quite frequently in this list of reasons why you are so amazing.

44) the apron. meat cutting. yes, please.

45) You have ALWAYS taken my feelings and opinion into consideration before making decisions and I've never had to wonder where I am on your priority list.

46) I can honestly say that every time we're together, it's just as fun and magical as it was when we first met - and even more snuggly feeling because now we are both Davises (and you KNOW the hades I went through to make that happen). ;)

47) You are my soulmate (kinda uncanny, really): dressing alike in the same house, but not knowing until after the fact, sharing the norovirus - including vomiting together every 30 minutes (sorry folks for the TMI), and then having "jinx" conversations about it almost two years later, having people constantly tell us we look like brother and sister (eww), etc.

48) Not only did you make me my fave Valentine's dinner, but you made sure the noodles were gluten free.

49) You went to Bilo first thing to get me some Decaf coffee even though I know you didn't want to.

50) You are always willing to help me however I need you to. I never feel alone in any endeavor and you have been the most amazing husband that I never, ever dreamed I'd be blessed to have.

Happy Birthday, Shugpie!

I love you so much and thank God for you every single day and STILL wonder what I ever did to be so blessed.



Sorry if my posting this to your facebook embarrassed you. You will get over it. Besides, wives have been known to do worse. ;)