random inconveniences/annoyances - because I love lists

1) I really want a Frosty from Wendy's or a Hot Fudge Sundae with Nuts from McDonald's but I am too lazy to go get it.

2) I'm ready to crawl in bed with a magazine, but the sheets are layin on it in a ball because I (stupidly) washed them today.

3) My hair is getting on my nerves because it is not long enough to wear up every single day of my life.

4) I look ghostly pale, per some pics I was in this weekend. But, I don't want to tan because I don't want wrinkles when I'm older and I don't feel like slathering fake tanner all over my body because I am scared it will look streaked, and I also think it's not good that it seeps into your skin and basically stains it dark brown/orange.

5) For two weeks, I've had to drink bottled Diet Mt. Dew because the can machine was out. I don't like bottled drinks because they don't stay cold as long, and they get flatter faster because of all the swishing back and forth when you turn the bottle up and down, up and down, up and down.
I am giving up my Diet Mt. Dew habit. I am severely cutting back on Diet Mt. Dew.

6) I wanted to eat a high carb snack a bit ago, but that would mean I'd have to change my pump site first because there's not enough insulin left in it. No thanks. I'll just eat low carb.

7) I hate my new zit issue. I also hate washing my face and putting "treatment" on it. I've never had to deal with such shiz before. Booooo.

8) I hate the new mascara I bought. It is clumpy. I hate when that happens. I want it to run out fast because I hate waste. Maybe I will start wearing like 8 coats a day and look like Twiggy Ramirez so I can get through it with the quickness. (FYI - I think the regular old "Falsies" is better.)

9) I also dislike it when you write on a post-it and then go to peel it off the pad, and realize the shiz is UPSIDE DOWN because it's one of those annoying accordion ones. Arghhhh!

10) The regular version of my Bare Escentuals foundation is lighter than the SAME SHADE in matte. What? Fraud.

Rejoice! It is the conclusion of "Hump" Day. Dos mas!

PS - Come see Shug on Pinterest if you feel so inclined.

i love the nikon.

random photo opps such as the ones below make me smile. that is all for today. because I am beyond exhausted. happy monday.

dear friday, I'll be your best friend if you brang it. faster.

Happy Birthday Anj!

Hello friends! Guess what?

Today is dear hubs' birfday. (Actually, it's not on the 25th, but the 26th. But, it is the 26th where he is right now. Yep. Think about that one. Weird, huh?)

Soooo ... I thought I would do something special (and embarrassing) for him here on the bloggage. Especially since he insists that all my endearing comments, photos and gestures (not to be confused with guesstures) are for the sole purpose of humiliating him, anyway.

So, here it is ...

Dearest Anjpie Davis,

Here is a list that just barely skims the BOJILLIONS of reasons why I am head. over. heels. in. love. with. you.

1) you always wear slippers - usually with socks

2) you laugh at my jokes/snarky comments

3) you have conversations with people who are unbeknownst to me ... in your sleep, complete with eyebrow raises, hand movements and laughs

4) you are a cursing, violent, scary, over-the-top, passionate sports watcher, especially when watching the Pack ... I typically only watch when State plays, but I ALWAYS love to watch you watching whoever ... and God knows YOU WILL watch EVERY team because you. need. to. know!

4a) we share a mutual hatred for carolina and everything that they think they are

5) you eat granola with honey and milk every. single. weekday. for breakfast (eggs and bacon are a part of your world on the weekends or holidays)

6) i love you in your PRADA reading glasses as you drink your tasty sometimes skunk-smelling brewed beverage

7) you wanted to keep your wisdom teeth after they had been ripped from the sockets (i kept my last one too)

8) oftentimes, you say, "how bout that?" after discovering something interesting

9) you obsessively brush and floss your teeth

10) you drink adult beverages from a proper low ball glass ... but only on Fridays, Saturdays, and holidays

11) you remind me how terrible my Diet Coke habit is ... but you will still bring me some from the store if I (nicely) ask you to

12) you love tailgating as much as I do, including getting out there at 7:30 am in 40 degree weather (which to us, is cold)

13) you build magical fires for us in the wintertime

14) to you, nothing could be greater than a small apple, straight from the fridge (not me, hurts my teeth) with peanut butter

15) you encourage and support me - always ... my blog, my love of photography, my creative ideas/daydreams, and tell me that I'm doing a great job taking care of my diabetes

16) you take great care in overseeing our finances. (because I loathe it) it feels great to be part of a team and know that you care about our future. :)  (and that app is the shiz)

17) you prefer to drink any warm beverage out of the awesome vintage NC Stizzle coffee cups (thanks Ber ... we love them dearly)

18) you smell good ... especially when wearing white t-shirts

19) you make us BOMB diggity chili

20) and beef bourguignon

21) and omelets (hey, you knew right off the bat how much I love to eat ... thanks for working two jobs in college to help support our my two meals per night habit ;) )

22) you listen to indie rock on Sirius

23) you use words in real conversation that most people use to jazz up term papers (confession: sometimes I pretend I don't know what words mean just so you will say, "What?! You don't know what ---- means?!" hehehehe)

24) you enjoy using Excel (bleck!)

25) you like taking me to the fair and rodeos and festivals (most of the time)

26) you bought me business card paper for Christmas so I could make business cards for my blog

27) you love Brody because I love Brody

28) you are optimistic 99.9999% of the time, and remind me of all we have to be thankful for when I am in a yuck mood

29) you like to try fun new restaurants (we should go eat German again soon .... yummmm)

30) we have the same sense of humor and can laugh at something simple, alone on our couch, for a good 15 minutes

31) you mute the TV when that annoying "silent treatment" AT&T commercial comes on ... or the Lowe's newlywed couple "Uh, yeah we do!" comes on  ... stab me

32) you always put peanut M&M's in my Christmas stocking

33) totes.

34) you picked out Bomb Arse yarn and knitting needles for me for Christmas (don't know if I coulda picked em that good)

35) you keep handy lists of things on small notepads

36) you are so smart, and many of our magical discussions have evolved from how you often start sentences with "Today, I was reading this article ..."

37) you laugh really, really loud when you watch Tosh.O

38) we both love 30 Rock

39) you stand up to watch TV because if you sit down, you will fall asleep (actually, I am typing this as I sit riiight beside you on the couch sleeping, ... no clue.)

40) I love our "system" ... you holler at the TV when State's playin, and I finish your inappropriate comment/explicative/angry outburst with "... Bitch!"

41) you think I am a hottie and tell me so (not exactly in these words)

42) you blow your nose with a handkerchief like only a real ballah would

43) garden fresh veggies. yumm-ay! I am starting to realize that your ability and desire to provide me with food is showing up quite frequently in this list of reasons why you are so amazing.

44) the apron. meat cutting. yes, please.

45) You have ALWAYS taken my feelings and opinion into consideration before making decisions and I've never had to wonder where I am on your priority list.

46) I can honestly say that every time we're together, it's just as fun and magical as it was when we first met - and even more snuggly feeling because now we are both Davises (and you KNOW the hades I went through to make that happen). ;)

47) You are my soulmate (kinda uncanny, really): dressing alike in the same house, but not knowing until after the fact, sharing the norovirus - including vomiting together every 30 minutes (sorry folks for the TMI), and then having "jinx" conversations about it almost two years later, having people constantly tell us we look like brother and sister (eww), etc.

48) Not only did you make me my fave Valentine's dinner, but you made sure the noodles were gluten free.

49) You went to Bilo first thing to get me some Decaf coffee even though I know you didn't want to.

50) You are always willing to help me however I need you to. I never feel alone in any endeavor and you have been the most amazing husband that I never, ever dreamed I'd be blessed to have.

Happy Birthday, Shugpie!

I love you so much and thank God for you every single day and STILL wonder what I ever did to be so blessed.



Sorry if my posting this to your facebook embarrassed you. You will get over it. Besides, wives have been known to do worse. ;)

friday with brody broham

Hey, peeps. Shug has been busy and exhausted this week - so she says. Me? I think she is just too lazy to get out the Nikon and upload real pics of me. But, whatevs.

Sometimes she takes pictures of me when she thinks I'm sleeping. Creepy right?

But I know her game. So I always sit up and cheese it for the camera.

Sometimes Shug lays in bed with the laptop or a magazine, and I think to myself, "Even with all those blankets, she is probably cold. After all, she doesn't have a gorgeous, shiny, black coat like me." So, because I'm such a nice guy, I lay my 85 pound self right across her knees. Yep. Don't move for hours. I know she really appreciates it.

You'd think in return, she wouldn't mind playing with me and my rope. But she gives up so easy. Claims the rope is hurting the skin on her hands. What a wimp.

Now, don't tell her I said this, but sometimes I think she brings new dogs around to make me jealous. Dogs in silly outfits and hats. I mean, she just sat him right in front of me. I sniffed him out and roughed him up a bit, but he just sat there like a knot on a log, so I figure he isn't a threat.

Sometimes, we go outside and play ball with this cool ball thrower. But not nearly enough. We only go out about 3 or 4 times a day. Lame. Sometimes I act like I have to pee, and I put the ball in my mouth and sneak it outside.

I've also got a system worked out where I get leftover containers. Of course, all of the food has already been eaten. I get to lick up all the remnants though. I prefer to take it onto the living room carpet. But - for some reason, Shug insisted I keep this Wendy's Chili container on the dining room floor. Hate that. I can't keep a good grip. I mean, she acts like I have hands. Gyah.

Hope your weekend's full of delicious treats, naps and ball throwing madness. If you're like me, you'll get more "me" time in since the humans are layin out from "work" on the weekends. I never believe they are working as much as they claim to be anyway, you know? Are you really goin to work in gym clothes at 8:30 pm? I don't think so. But, let them have their fun.

Love, 

Brody Broham



Also, check out:

reasons people don't call me girly

But it's not as intense as it was as you can see evidenced in this photo:

You see, friends. I know my nails are a) done. b) pink. - which sort of contradicts this post title. Screw Nostradamus, this madness happenin here on ma nails could signal the end of the world. But, what you can't see in the photo is how badly I want to grab them with my teeth and rip the paint off, followed by intense biting down to the quick. But I need to stop. Right? So, I'm sitting here, staring at my nails, fighting the urge to attack them, thinkin, "I feel like bloggin. But, I don't really have anything appropriate to say." Then, I thought, "Gyahhhh. I wonder how long I can stand my nails like this. Hopefully the fact that I put forth effort to paint them will keep me from biting them and making them look haggard x10." Then, I kept on thinkin, "How did I come from someone so prissy?" And, this blog post was born. I give to you:

Reasons Why People Don't Call Me Girly

Enjoy.

* I HATE the mall. Well, I strongly dislike it. I like to go about once every 6 months when I know exactly what I'm looking for. And it's because I can't find it anywhere outside the mall. And plus, the mall makes me thirsty. And I hate water, so I inevitably end up consuming mass amounts of Diet Coke. Fail.

* I am not addicted to stuff that other chicks (apparently) love ... Grey's, The Real ho-wives of BlahBlahBlah, Kardashians, Bachelor, blah, blah, blah

* I pretty much dislike pink - especially in baby clothes ... I don't understand a couple of things:
 1) who started pink = girl, and blue = boy? Guess what? Not only am I not a pink-lover, I ain't down with baby blue either;
 2)coating an entire room in pink ... lace, ruffles, bows, ribbons, anything "princess" (die) ... I can handle a little floral, mixed with some stripes or something ... and a dash of pink occasionally, but not more than a dash.What's wrong with purple and green and yellow and pastels?

* Even though I constantly teach youngsters how inaprops it is to belch out, I totally do it all the time.

* I prefer beer, then Beam & Coke, then wine ... but I usually find wine to be nauseating and it makes my pulse race and my head throb.

* I don't allow other people to touch my diabetic feet to paint them. I've done this literally like twice in my life. GERMS. GROSS. And I can do that shiz at home for free. And Andrew will massage my feet if I ask him to.

* Monogramming must be kept to a minimum - flasks, keepsakes, LL Bean shiz.

* spas, massages, etc ... again, weirds me out. I don't want anybody rubbin me down that I ain't married to.

* I will pee outside if I have to (i.e., tailgating/mudslingin/after a second date on the way home and the nearest facility is waaaaaay over yonder somewhere. No thanks.

* I don't count calories or fat grams and eat rabbit food for lunch. NOT because I think I'm the hotness, but because I love food and I'm not willing to add more shiz to my "keep up with this" list. Just eat the damn fries. Thank you. And bring me some ranch to go with.

* Oftentimes, I am the one who is being rowdy/shouting obscenities at the other team at NC State football games. Sometimes, I think Andrew is genuinely embarrassed.

* I HATE heels. Both tarheels and pumps ;) Now, let me be clear. I think they are hot. But, I DO NOT wear them, unless I am in someone's wedding or attending some function that lasts no more than a few hours. My cowboy hoots are the highest heels I actually wear. I don't know how you shugpies wear them painful ass shoes. Ouch.

* I cuss like a sailor. I am starting to feel some guilt about this, however. It is a work in progress.

* I didn't give a royal rat's ass about the royal wedding

I DO, however enjoy the following:

* shopping at flea markets, thrift stores, consignment shops, and yard sales where I will purchase vintage fabrics that contain florals

* makeup - foundation, eyes, lips (although I didn't start wearing it until college) .. I don't get into "skin products"

* hair - so ready for this shiz to be long enough to pull up into some top knot - so admire you chicks with long, thick, magical hair

* acupuncture - my version of spa/pedicure/"me" time
 
* I don't so much mind painted piggies - but I like to do them myself, thank you.

* I do love me a leather handbag and some boots.

* Bachelorette weekends/girls' trips? Yes, please. Get. away. throw. down. 


Interesting because I totally did not play sports. (Except one random year of volleyball because I was "tall" {5'6" !!!} at the tiny tiny tiny high school I attended freshman year). That's right. I'm not girly OR athletic. Also, my mama is pretty prissy (or is high maintenance a better term?) She has a job that requires "dressing up" - everyday, skirts, hoses, accessorizing and some type of heel. Annnnnd she loves some girly decor and thinks my burps are absolutely horrendous. (I've caught her burping like that a handful of times, though. If this is my last post it's because my mom hid my body after reading this). She did her best to make me wear tights, but eventually the crotch grabbing from the incessant riiiiiding got old. And dance class? No dice. Just wasn't worth the weekly sob fest.

Also, one of my best friends is mayjahly girltastic, but I guess we just get where the line is in each others' taste. She was my MOH in my wedding, and her mother was our director, and they both had to BEG me to get my nails painted for the festivities. But I drew the line at an eyebrow wax. Hell to the naw. I've seen how some people look after some cray cray gets a hold of their eyebrows.

To each his her own.