some thoughts on age

we celebrate quite a few birthdays in our families between october and november.
there's also been loss, and some sad news recently.
and at the same time, there have been several births and several reasons to celebrate.

it got me to thinking about life, and age and what it really means.

anj and i are both 29, and several of our friends have already turned 30 or will very soon. people are like, "OMG. The big three-oh."
but why? it's another day. a day to be celebrated. not a time to bitch and whine about everything you don't have and you haven't done.

maybe your childhood sucked and your adulthood is everything you dreamed it would be.
maybe you went through some serious shit, and you hit your rock bottom.
maybe now, as an adult, you are doing what you love everyday and getting paid for it.
maybe you're not. but maybe you have a wonderful family, or wonderful friends, or better yet, some of each to share this life with.
maybe you have perfect health and appreciate it. maybe you have perfect health and take it for granted because you are too busy concentrating on something else.
maybe you have shitty health, but can still say that you are genuinely happy over all.
things are all about perspective, aren't they? 
 i think that a positive outlook is something that you have to want, and seek out. it doesn't just happen. sometimes a positive outlook involves getting negative people and dead ends out of your life, even if it hurts at first. for me, a positive outlook took a lot of prayer. and i try very hard to see the positive in every situation. if you make yourself do it for awhile, it starts to come naturally.

some people say all they want is for their kids to be happy.
well, i don't.
i think that's selling them short.
you cannot give your kids happy. and the more you try to mold the situation to make them happy, or buy it for them, the more you are preventing them from learning and growing.
life is about obstacles. things beyond our control.
sometimes our feelings are hurt, or we are given the raw end of the deal.
but, it teaches us to be grateful and have compassion.

and we become obsessed with physical appearance, more so as we age.
i weigh more than i used to. but, i don't hate my body. i'm grateful for the body God gave me. the only people who look cute skinny as hell and shaped like a tampon are 15 year old girls.
to me, my husband gets better looking with age.
my mom looks better now than she did when she was young and skinny as a rail.
i think what's attractive is your attitude, and taking care of your body, even if you aren't a size 6.

i had a friend once who was devastated to turn 25. she was also the friend who ran all. the. damn. time. not attractive. i wanted to smack the shit out of her.

i personally, am loving 29. i love being married. i'm truly happy now. i'd love to have a child, but I also know that my marriage is a blessing that not everyone has.

i know women with great grandkids who can admit they've never known what it was like to be truly head over heels in love. to be best friends with your husband. to have fun every single day. to make each other laugh. there are also women who are grandmothers who will not get out of their house to have some fun with their girlfriends because they are a slave to routine. they are terrified the house will fall apart with them gone away for a weekend. or maybe they are terrified it won't fall apart without them there to run everything?

i love home. i love making meals together. making things to take to reunions, and get togethers. i like that we are in the age of going to shows and being home by 12 instead of getting started at 12. while i enjoyed high school and college, i have no desire to go back. maybe for a day, but i'm sure i'd be ready to get back to where i am now.

i like decorating our home. folding our laundry. the sound of the dishwasher running. the best part of my day is snuggle time with anj in our white t-shirts, while we each read our respective books in bed or on the couch, with a fire going if it's cold enough. my favorite shoes are my ll bean mocassins. i don't buy things with a high heel because they make my back hurt. i also do not buy things that have to be ironed. life is too short to spend time doing something you hate so you can look cute. to all you ladies without back pain and who love to iron, march on, shugpies!

some people die when they are 15. some take their own lives because they are miserable. some die having the time of their lives. other people finally learn to live when they are 45. they learn that you can't please everybody, but you can be kind and do what's good for your health and your soul.

what do you think? what does age mean to you?

Halloween costumes should not be bought as one piece

I think I can thank my mama for my love of Halloween. When we were kids, our costumes were not some random last minute purchase. {There was no Walmart. Roses was it. And even so, a random store-bought costume was just not gonna get it.}

We would scavenge closets - our closets, her closet, my grandparents' closets, aunts' and uncles' closets - whosever to get what we needed to feel that the mission had been accomplished. One time, Mama used orange food colorin in my little brother, Eric's hair because he was a pumpkin that year. Took a week to completely wash out.

You can see below that I am one awesome gypsy.

And that lil fella is my brother. Truth be told, at that age, he dressed like that everyday, minus the 'stache. Tool belt, too. Although, I don't think Mama would let him wear it to school.
The cowgirl is my friend Amanda. She would often go with us.
{What is Eric tryin to steal from Amanda's pocket?}

Amanda - a hippie. Me - Cher? Another hippie?

 Eric - the pirate.

Those floral pants that Amanda's wearing are mine. I totally rocked them in 5th grade on the regular. Those polka dotted ones that I'm wearing too.

I remember we would always get cheeseburgers and hotdogs from Stuart's and get an early start. You see, we didn't go door-to-door. My mama drove us all over the county to people's houses that we knew. Being diabetic, they always had something special for me. Everything from baggies of change, pencils, erasers, stickers, Lisa Frank notebooks, sugar-free gum, to turnips. And any candy that I couldn't eat would be brought home and sold to my uncle for the price of $5.

Thanks, Buck.

Love Halloween.

I still love the magic of it even now.
Posting this year's pics later in the week.

hold up! get a pair.

Christmas is comin, y'all!

I mean, is there anything they haven't thought of? 

I'm off to Target to purchase last minute goodies for Halloweeeeeeeen!

Happy Birthday Big Silas

Today is the F.I.L.'s b-dizzle.

I love me some Silas.

If you know him, you are lucky.

There really are no words. 

But, we'll try.

As a tribute, hubs and  I have worked to compile a "List of Silas":

{1}

when a food is really, really good, to show your appreciation and excitement, hop from one foot to the other sayin somethin like, "oooooooh wheeeeeee! that's good eatin!"

{2}

ASAP = As Southern As Possible

{3} 

SPF 70 sunscreen

{4}

"Peaches" from a mason jar

{5}

 "Apples" from a mason jar

{6}

special order shoes - because the best NC State runners' feet are narrow and have no arch

{7}

RFD TV

{8}

slaw

{9}

"You pooshin or pullin back there?"

{10}

"I'm sick and tarred of ... (endless possibilities here, folks).

{11}

yuppies = the ruination of Charlotte and the South as a culture

{12}

6 scoops of Mayfield ice cream = one Silas-sized serving

{Apparently this is genetic}

{13}

Upon telling any story:

* hand usage for emphasis * 

"Well, well, now, you see .......... you see."

{14}

"There's plenty of tomatoes/okra/beans now. Y'all come on an' pick 'em before they get rotten."

{15}

 National Geographic Magazine

{16}

Wall Street Journal

{17}

PBS

{18}

after a good meal, put on your snuggly clothes and find you a good chair to take you a nap

{or forgo the snuggly clothes, whatev}

We heart Big Silas.

Happy Birthday!!!

it's fall! let's get our deco-rate on!!

After yesterday's wreath craftin extravaganza, I was feelin inspired to get full blown with the fall madness.

All with stuff we already had!

Whoop! Whoop!

I just stayed in the same color scheme and wanted a dab of scurry, but mostly fallish. I'm not big on glitter and crinoline and such.

I like a more neutral approach.

You can basically collect anything you've got layin around that's in your choice of a fall color scheme and tie it together with some black and some candles.

Mmmmm. 

The mantel:

The bookshelf:

Comfy chair:

Now, if it would just dip below 70 outside.

Happy Weekend!

dear ________________,

dear dairy free liquid creamer, 

you are the shizzz and make my coffee so much more delicious than fat free milk.

dear pumpkin pie spice,

i'm so glad i found a use for you more than once a year by sneaking you into my coffee grounds before brewing.

#mmmm

{a lil tidbit for all you "fake hashtag" haters}

dear whipped cream,
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

dear truvia,
thanks for removing my splenda guilt.

y'all all rock:

 
 dear sausage/egg/cheese scramble,

you make my friday complete.

  
dear goodwill,

i am coming for you after the today show is over and i fold all those towels and shower and attempt to do something with my hair and face. i hope you have somethin - just onnnne thing?? - that makes me super excited that i stopped by.

dear weird dreams that started at pregnancy and are still goin strong,

gimme a break. i feel like i never sleep.

dear hair loss,

really? is it hormonal fluctuation? is it my thyroid medicine? {ironic} it's been real. it's time for you to GO.

dear wusthof knives,

how many times does it take me to learn your game? nothin like drippin blood all over the counter while you cook breakfast. luckily, i didn't pass out like a brother i have whose name does not start with E.

 
dear starbucks:

you cost too damn much, which is as i said above, why i have rigged my own pumpkin spice deal at home. however, there still ain't nothin like the real thang. maybe twice a season, i am super excited to stop by and get a venti pumpkin spice latte and it never disappoints.

 
 dear brody,

i know you think i humiliate you sometimes by taking way too many pics of you, but at least you're not this dog:

 
 dear halloween,

i am sort of sad that i have totally ignored you this year. i am so past the slut costumes and alcohol imbibing during halloween. but, i am sort of sad i didn't throw together some kind of outfit for handing out candy.

dear jeff,

happy birthday! it is so weird that i am 10 years older than you and you are just starting college. also, that i totally remember your precious red curls and changing your not so precious diapers.

easy, cheap burlap wreath!!

I knew easy and cheap would get y'all's attention. 

Who doesn't love a good fall wreath?

Know what I love more?

One that I can make from mess I got layin' around the house {mostly - with a lil help from Big Silas' store}

What I used:

* burlap sacks {I used two great big ones} ... you could also buy a roll of burlap fabric

* a wire hanger

* old white shower curtain I accidentally shrunk in the wash

* vintage apron that had a stain on it anyway

* scissors

* needle nose pliers {to help bend the wire}

__________

Unwind your rack hanger {just for you Anj} because you will use it to "stitch" through the burlap

Since I used a burlap bag, I cut the three closed edges off to get rid of the seams and to make it two "sheets" of fabric

Then I cut strips vertically {about 4" wide}

__________

Next, you will "stitch" the hanger through the burlap, it just pokes through really easily like a needle.

I've shown two different "ways" below. If you stitch close to the center, your wreath will not lay as flat against your door, which is fine if your method of hanging will support it without the wreath popping off.

Since my hook is sort of small {and stays on the door year round}, I wanted less fabric on the back side of the wreath so that it would be flatter against my door and not pop off every time we shut the door.

So, I stitched about an inch from one edge of the fabric, rather than in the center like in the picture above.

Regardless of which way you go, you just wanna fold your burlap back and forth like a ribbon and just thread the hanger through each time.

__________

To be honest, when I started, I wasn't sure how it would look or what I'd want to add to make it more interesting. I knew I didn't want to get super fall with it, because I wanted to be able to make some simple changes later to make it more suitable for Christmas.

With burlap alone, and, with closing the hanger up to make a smaller circle than I originally planned, I still had a lot of leftover wire exposed and it looked mayjahly ghetto.

So ... this is where I decided to shred pieces of an old shower curtain I accidentally shrunk in the wash. {Oops}

I would get them started with scissors, and then tear them the rest of the way to get the edges to look rough and worn instead of scissor-cut.

{These strips are about 3" x 10"}

Then I just tied them onto the wire in a knot. {Some were tied between the separate strips of burlap, while some where mixed into a strip of burlap ... just put em in however you like until it's as full as you like.}

Finally, for the "fall" aspect, I decided to use the apron I mentioned earlier because it was orange and white {and vintage!!!} 

I did the same thing - {three} 3" x 10" strips. 

I tied two of the strips into bows and then just knotted the third strip underneath the bows so that I had a little hanging down.

__________

To finish it off, I just used the needle nose pliers to hook the two wire ends into each other, and then just wrapped and wrapped around any excess wire {because I didn't have wire cutters and I'm too cheap to go buy some.}

__________

Here's the finished product

{I debated cutting the stringy parts off, but I was too lazy to cut them off and I already uploaded this pic think I kinda like it.}

Also, the pic is taken hangin from our mantle instead of on our door because I look too haggard to be outside on the porch takin photos.

{in this pic, the white ribbons look sort of clustered, but when I hung it on the door, I just adjusted the white ribbons and twisted the burlap a bit until I was satisfied}

Hope the hubs digs it when he gets home cause it's here to stay and he tends to be picky about such things.

To make for a more magical crafting experience, I recommend consuming these bomb ass gluten free chocolate chip cookies {Harris Teeter} and listening to Chatham County Line while you work. 

;)

Happy Fall Wreathin, Shugpies!

thank you ... serious stuff

Sometimes it's really hard to find "peace". But, I think if you look for it, you find a little bit here, and a little bit there. Little pieces of calm. Little reminders that everything's cool. It's gone be aiight.

After all, who ever said life was always peaches & cream?

I just wanted to share a couple of little pieces of sunshine here on the bloggy today. 

The first is the photo above, taken around 7:30 am at my Meemaw's house.

It makes me happy.

The second is the feeling of peace and calm that comes from just being still and listening. Simplicity. God does talk, if we can calm down long enough to listen. 

The photos below are taken at an older church in my hometown. 

To me, there is something serene and comforting about old churches.
Just the people, the hymn books, the Bible and God.

I realize I have spoken more of God lately, likely because of the baby we lost. I also realized I have lost a few followers.  Well, good riddance, sugar pies. I believe that God comes and finds us in His time, whether we are ready or not.  I also believe that He comes around in simple ways to remind us that He's there.
I have to tell y'all what happened to me last week. An unknown number called my cell, and I didn't recognize it, so I ignored it. Figured they'd leave a message if they really knew me and needed to talk to me.  Several hours later, the same number called back. Anj and I were online, trying to look up the number, and all we found was that it was a local wireless number. A few moments later, I realized they'd left a voice mail this time.
Guess who it was.


My surgeon.         Calling to thank me {?!?!?!} for the thank you note I sent to his office. You see, about a week after my surgery, I decided to send the nurses on that hospital floor, and my gynecologists' office a thank you card. Because even though it is "their job" to care for patients physically, they went above and beyond to make sure I was comfortable & felt taken care of, and treated me like a human being with feelings instead of just another "ectopic". I have had doctors in the past who were assholes and should not have been in charge of taking care of a house plant, much less people trying to have a child.
Anyway, in the card, I thanked him and my other doctor {who couldn't do my surgery because he had to fly out of town that night for a conference}, as well as the nurse and the sonogram lady because they were all so warm, and so kind. I never once feared the surgery, and I just felt in my heart that I was in good hands. I told them in the card that I thanked God for putting me under their care, because the whole experience would have been absolutely terrifying had this all happened with my last doctor {whose name sounded very close to Dr. Vulgar Puss - should have been a sign}.
So, he said in the voice mail that he couldn't let it go without calling me to tell me how much the card meant to them, and that it was so heartfelt and sweet, and that he prays that I will have a healthy pregnancy in the very near future, and God bless.
I think God talks to us all in His own special way. We all hear Him differently. But to me, that may as well have been God himself callin to say, "Girrrrl, I got this. You need to just calm down, shug."
Soooo, a couple things:
1) Never underestimate the power of thank you - you never know how it might brighten someone's day, or even mean much, much more to them than you even intended 2) God is bigger than all our problems. He will talk with you if you ask Him to. Try not to give up even though it's hard to understand how God can allow so much pain even though He loves us. 3) Trust your instincts. I never liked my last doctor. He was a dick. He was monotone and sounded just like that dude on the Clear Eyes commercial. I knew when I met these doctors the first time, that I was in good hands, and I am tellin y'all, it made all the difference in how I am coping with what happened.
I would also like to say thank you to those of you who read my blog. I love nothing more than reading your comments, and hearing what you think. My blog is a little different than most blogs in blogland. A lot of my readers are people who are not in my age group, and are people who grew up the way I did, and like me, feel blessed to have grown up in the rural south. I don't really know "what this blog is about". I just write whatever I want. I try not to talk politics, because it's a good way to lose friends.  But, I do talk God, and there won't ever come a time when I refrain from talking about God when I want to. That's what's wrong with the world now. People believe in something in private, but when it comes to standing up for it in public, they are afraid of being judged, or being different than their friends. I'm not being something I'm not to gain followers, or to keep from losing them. That's not why I write, so the button has been deleted. I'm not interested in hosting a give away every week to bribe people into reading my blog, or linking up every other day to pimp myself out. To each his own.
Some posts on the blog are bitch fests, some posts are recaps of something we did, some posts are somethin good I ate that I think y'all should know about. But, it's all me.
So, not sure what deleting the gadget did as far as you readers who were "followers" via the button ... but you can still subscribe via your email address if you'd like.
Thanks for everything shugs!
xo 

Chatham County Line

Y'all.

If any part of your soul likes bluegrass or fiddles or banjos or mandolins or bass guitars or regular guitars or harmonicas or the south as a culture, then you need to check out 

Chatham County Line

crappy phone pic, sorry

We saw a show last night in NoDa and it was mind blowing.

I loved it!

They are all from NC

and they rock.

I think of it as bluegrass on Mt. Dew with a mix of folk.

LOVE. LOVE. LOVE.

Check them out! Download them on Itunes. 

Here's a playlist below. Listen!

kanye cray cray - mercy

i know this song is old as Methusalah, but WHAT is kanye on? homeless folks? swervin? say whuuuut? that "ooh-wheee ooh wheee" noise/voice in the background CREEPS me out. and they hop-bounce around like 15-y.o. white boys. are they in a parkin lot?  I'm so confused. :/

jordan - any comments?

FACEBOOK: If you no likey, delete your account!

First off, today's post was inspired by the lovely Whitney at I Wore Yoga Pants to Work. You see, she is a Twitter kinda girl, and is supa fed up with Facebook, so she wrote a post called 10 reasons why Facebook sucks {my favorite on her list is #9}. While I personally love me some Facebook, I do totally get where she's coming from with her list of FB annoyances. So, duh, it is wise for her to delete her account because she finds that shit to be crampin her style. And now, she is soul-cleansed and free and happy. Go Whitney!

So, while I do love some Facebook, it needs to be said:

IF YOU WANT TO BITCH ALL DAY AND NIGHT ABOUT SHIT PEOPLE DO AND SAY ON FACEBOOK, YOU EITHER GONE HAVE TO DEAL WITH IT  ... OR ... wait for it ... YOU CAN DELETE YOUR ACCOUNT. 
K, SHUGS?

{Again, I do strongly suggest you go check out her post, because it is true, and hilarious.}

In addition to her awesome list, I would like to add the following:

11. CREEPERS - some of y'all are sneaky, puss ass stalkers. Straight up. I don't mean lookin through people's pictures stalkers. Pictures are there to look at, and if people didn't want "non-friends" seein their biz-nass, then they could just change their settings. 

I'm talkin about y'all people on Facebook day and night, never sayin a worrrrd, but tellin everythang you read to everybody you know, like you gettin paid to be a spy - except that shit is ON THE INTERNET.
Or, you wanna casually mention to somebody somethin you stalked on their page, but didn't actually comment on or acknowledge ON Facebook while you were creepin. 

We all know y'all are out there.

And here's somethin that'll blow your mind: 

People put shit on facebook because they don't give a damn who sees or knows it.

See how that works? Take a minute to think about it.

Ready to go on?

Okay.

BUT - again, if you want to stay on Facebook, this is the shiz you sign up for.

So, if you hate it when people check in every ten minutes, or post pictures of their baby and everything they do every ten seconds, or tell people what they ate for lunch, or post political shit {my favorite}, or any of the other things Whitney described ... you can unsubscribe from them, or if you got really big balls, unfriend them ... OR .... here it comes again ... YOU CAN DELETE YOUR DAMN ACCOUNT.

TA-DA! See? It's eassssssy.

But, NOBODY IS MAKING YOU READ IT. 

Do we now all understand how the internet works?

Remember, you can always just say no {like Ms. Whitney, duh!}

And, just for fun, here is some Someecards/Facebook love.

And so, there you have it friends.
That's what Facebook is, a dumping ground - to tell people about your life, your relationships, your kids, your lunch, your asthma, your new coffee table, your anniversary, your toenail fungus, whatever the hell you want to tell people.

I mean, what is considered "proper" Facebook posting anyway, you know?
Regardless of what it is, the person who posted it will think it's beyond thrilling, and somebody else will think, "Who gives a shit?"

Luckily, you have a way out.

PS - TOTALLY off topic: Did anybody hear Roy Williams say "mixed marriage" on ESPNU's ACC Media Day Special last night when what he meant was "house divided"? Poor shug.

I leave you with this final image of the lovelies in Chapel Hill doin' their thang.
 Enjoy your day!

***

list of happies.

i woke up in a great mood today, despite the fever blister family reunion that is taking over my mouth right now. the good new is, today they are not causing teeth pain, swollen lymph nodes, neck pain and therefore, a bangin headache. little bastards.

anyway, my list of happies:

* the bomb old black ladies i saw on my walk this mornin. i admit, i am jealous i didn't have a prominent black lady figure in my childhood like willetta from divine secrets of the ya ya sisterhood, or like aibileen from the help. now don't get it twisted -  i am not a racist. i didn't say i wanted a black maid. i said i wanted a prominent black lady figure in my childhood. won't no maids or even once a month cleanin ladies in my house, frands.

* feeling super awesome after my walk - physically, mentally, and emotionally AWESOME.

* editing photos - for clients, of course, but also because i crack myself up doing shiz like this:

* super crisp red grapes alternated with mouthfuls of sunflower seeds

* blood sugars like this. BAM!

* getting paid to take surveys. whoop!

* caffeine free diet mt. dew. i LOVE crunk diet mt. dew, and for a lot of people, the whole point is the caffeine, duh, but with surgery recovery, it's important to stay hydrated, so even though CFDMD is not healthy by any stretch, i am so happy there is a CF version. holla!

* tootsie pops. how awesome, right? just enough chocolate. not bad on calories. fulfilling because you can't just chomp it down in one bite. {i mean, i guess you could, but why?}

* this shiz, which smells HEAVENLY {although i find its name irritating. wouldn't creamy baby oil make more sense?}:

 

and here's what's not so awesome:

* i've read a zillion places all the benefits of coconut oil. i've used it on my skin before - cuts, blemishes, dryness, etc. however, it's supposed to be all kinds of goodness for the inside of ya body too. but, somebody share, HOW DO YOU CONSUME THAT SHIZ WITHOUT GAGGIN LIKE A MAGGOT? can i get a RALPH up in heah? woof! it's solid at room temp, so it has to be melted, or it's like nibblin on cold, crusty butter. hurltasma, right? so, the best thing i've discovered is putting it on hot toast, and smotherin that sonofabitch in peanut butter. and that's just ONE TEASPOON. any suggestions? anyone? mmmk. well, if you think of somethin, do holla.

have a magical .... what is this? wednesday?